This Post is Brought to You By: Things I Don't Want to Do

Two of my biggest motivators when it comes to blogging are 1) being excited about something and 2) avoiding something.

When I'm approaching an event I'm looking forward to, I am more prone to posting. I usually write a lot when I'm about to go on vacation. I just don't tell you that's why I'm posting... cuz you'll probably rob my house while I'm gone (you'll be very disappointed if you're not a fan of really beat up furniture and LOL dolls with no heads).

I also post frequently when there's something I don't want to do. Which is the case right now. I just got back from the grocery store. I would consider this a "medium" trip. I bought more stuff than I'm willing to ring up in the self-checkout but not enough stuff to bunker down while the corona virus scare pitters out. Even though my haul is "medium" (i.e. "manageable") in nature, I don't want to put any of it away. I did the refrigerated products, and everything else is sitting on the counter, stove, and floor while I engage in avoidance behaviors write this post.

Here's the incomplete list of other things I'm currently putting off:

Scheduling well-child appointments for my kids. Everyone is due, but I think I'll wait until summer. It will give us something to do, and keep us out of a doctor's office during flu season. Plus my kids won't have to miss school. Wins all around! Talked me into it.

Exercising. I went for a walk this morning, so I can check a little movement off my list, but I also try to do some weight lifting everyday. That's what I'm putting off. I just went grocery shopping. I shouldn't have to lift anything for at least three hours.

Showering. There's no reason to shower if I could potentially exercise more today. But if I keep putting off exercise, my shower gets later and later. And I'm going to exercise again first thing tomorrow morning, so I should just wait until after that, right? I don't have plans today. I don't need to be pretty or clean.

Putting laundry away. I don't think I need to even explain this one. I just don't wanna. My "laundry development plan" (I just now named it that) for my children is that from age 6, I fold their clothes and they have to put them away until they turn 9. When they turn 9, they have to start folding/hanging and putting away their own clothes. Why age 9? Because that's when I started making Nicky do his, so I'm just keeping it that way for everyone else for consistency. It's far more work for me to supervise my kids putting their clothes away than it would be for me to just do it myself, which makes me dread it. The fighting... the whining... the shoving of clothes in drawers and having to make them do it over. Sigh...

All varieties of cleaning. 'Nuff said.

Working on the birthday poster for March. I have the supplies. I just need to do it.

Now the question is... should I watch Veronica Mars or read a book?

When the Lord Called Me to Sing Soprano

Speaking of Church music...

Early this morning I had a thorough planning session for my upcoming singing times at Church. I like to plan at least a month in advance with a tentative idea of what I'll be doing for the next three months. I also have a skeletal framework outlined for the entire year, and I make adaptions as needed.

Planning session supplies include:

Laptop

"Come Follow Me" basket with cat folder

Sustenance (i.e. water and Smarties from Sister Argyle)

Spreadsheet

I plan ahead; otherwise I procrastinate. A lot of the time I gather my materials last minute (I've been known to spend Sunday mornings laminating), but I always have my plan far in advance. I don't do well planning week by week. I do better when I do big planning sessions and then spend a little time each week reviewing and prepping.

I've been serving as primary music leader for two years AS OF THIS WEEK, and I feel like I'm finally starting to figure it out.

Let me tell you the story of how the calling of primary music leader came to me.

Shortly after I had Nicky (thirteen years ago), I had a dream that I was asked to be the primary music leader. It was an assignment I never wanted and never thought I could do. When I woke up, I was so relieved it was only a dream. It couldn’t be a foretelling of things to come because our ward had just sustained a new primary chorister a couple of months prior. I didn’t need to worry.

That day happened to be a Sunday. As Scotty and I were nestling into our pew before sacrament meeting, the ward executive secretary came up to me and asked if I could meet with a member of the bishopric later that day. It made me nervous, but again, our chorister was newly called, so I knew that couldn't be what they wanted to talk to me about. It was just a funny coincidence.

During sacrament meeting, much to my surprise, the "new" chorister was sustained as a counselor in the primary presidency. Suddenly, to my dismay, there was a need for a new primary music leader. I immediately became sick. I spent the rest of church wiping tears from my eyes. I couldn't accept the calling. I just couldn't. I hadn't attended primary much as a child. I'd never served in primary. I didn't know the songs or how anything in primary worked. And the thought of standing up in front of a room of children and adults SINGING was absolutely terrifying to me.

There were a few hours in between church and my appointment with the bishopric. During those hours, I was a mess. I ran through every excuse I could think of so I could turn down the calling and not feel guilty. It might sound silly. You might think, "Just say no. What's the big deal?" but my reasons for not wanting to accept the calling didn't align with my belief in inspired callings and patterns of personal growth. I finally turned it over to the Lord, and offered in a prayer to do the calling if that was where He wanted me to serve.

When I headed into the church, I was very nervous. I worried I was going to burst out sobbing in front of a man who wouldn't know what to do about it. And, of course, I had to meet with the counselor in the bishopric with the worst people skills.

I sat across from him, ready to face my fate. Prepared to accept the calling. Trying to not cry.

He asked me to be an Activity Days leader.

------

So I guess you could say I got all hyped up for no reason. But I kind of think I needed that experience. I learned a lot about myself and about serving in the church in those few hours of turmoil.

Many years later, I was called to serve in the primary presidency. I finally got to see how things worked in primary, and as I observed a couple different music leaders in their service, I noted two things:

1) I could do it if I ever had to
2) Eventually, I would be the primary chorister

After serving as the second counselor in primary for a while, I was called to be the first counselor with a new president. Then I was called to be the president. When I was serving as first counselor and then president, my friend Jennifer served as primary chorister. I knew I would replace her. Fortunately, Jennifer served for well over five years. I was able to teach youth Sunday school for almost three years. Then I was asked to meet with a member of the bishopric, and I knew what was coming.

I still didn't want to do it. I didn't want to leave the youth. I hadn't recovered yet from being the primary president. The thought of having to go to primary with my kids horrified me. I wanted to participate in Relief Society. I wanted to be with adults. I was worried that going back to primary might trigger my depression (it did) (when I was serving as primary president I struggled with depression pretty bad, and I think being with kids all the time was a factor). The ultimate kicker is that I don't like very many primary songs (gasp! I know!!! What kind of Saint am I? But I'm an alto, and those dang songs are so stinkin' high!)

As you know, I accepted the calling. I had to have some really thorough conversations with God about it, and I felt a promise from Him in my heart that as I did this calling, my gifts would increase. And I can tell you, they have! I've had an increased measure of love for the children in my ward, an influx of creativity, better musical ability, enhanced teaching skills, and an ever-growing understanding of the gospel. I might even be able to sing a little higher now, but I'll always be pretty pitchy, and I'll never start on key.

That's not to say that I didn't spend the first eighteen months of the calling absolutely hating it. I truly suffered. But I've come around. Two-hour church helps. Kids giving me hugs and calling me "my teacher" also helps.

One little boy, on his last day of primary at the end of the year last year, sought me out after church and said, "Don't worry, this isn't good-bye forever." He cracked me up and melted my heart. And the little punk hasn't said hi to me since.

Just kidding. He passed the sacrament to me last week. That's as good as a hello, in my book.

I didn't anticipate ever being able to say this, but I love my calling!

(Oh my gosh!! I can't believe I just said that!)

Facial Masks are Not For the Weak (and ten other random facts)

Fact #1: I'm sitting at my kitchen table right now with a peeling mask applied to my face. Did you ever coat the back of your hand with Elmer's glue in school and let it dry so you could peel it off? (Please say yes). It's pretty much like that. But on my face. It's magical! And hilarious to peel it off in front of Scotty because it grosses him out.

Me removing my 

face mask for Scotty

Fact #2: Today I was about to head to Cafe Rio to meet Christie for lunch (sans Thor costume) when I heard a sound in the garage. Past experience led me to believe that the spring on on the garage door had just broken. I went out there to check, and sure enough...

It was a bummer because this is the third time we've lost a spring.

Fact #3: I tried opening the door manually so I could leave to meet Christie, but without the spring, it was too heavy for me to lift alone, and the van was trapped. I called two people for help, but neither answered, so Christie rushed me some emergency food to soothe my woes.

I would've enlisted Christie to help me when she got to my house, but by then, a repairman was on his way.

Fact #4: The repairman fixed the spring and did a good overhaul on our door to prevent a few other problems.

Fact #5: We've lived in our house for 16 years as of February 1st!

Fact #6: Scotty has been diligently working on our basement. The day I first sit on our new couch, prop up my feet, and turn on the TV downstairs, I will cry tears of joy.

Fact #7: We had some excellent board gaming over the weekend.

Fact #8: Definition of "excellent board gaming" - Scotty didn't win.

Chad won Agricola and 7 Wonders. Carlie won Wingspan. And I won Risk.

(See Game Night Ledger for more details).

Fact #9: I'm 35 days soda sober.

Fact #10: My face peeling is underway, and it is a spectacular sight! Pretty sure I accidentally lost half an eyebrow.

A Tale of Three Hymns

As you may remember, I'm the primary music leader in my ward (for those not familiar with my religious vernacular, I teach music to the children at church) (my qualifications for this job are: none). The Come Follow Me - for Primary manual suggested singing "How Great Thou Art" as part of the lesson this week, so today for singing time, I taught it to the kids.

They LOVED it!

They were rowdy as heck, but when they sang that song, they sounded better than... well... pretty much any other time I've had them sing. I even had one kid raise his hand and ask if he could sing the chorus as a solo (I'm still trying to decide whether he was serious). It kind of makes me hope that some of them will someday say, "I love the song 'How Great Thou Art.' I learned it in primary!"

We'll see...

Anyway, I, for one, have always loved "How Great Thou Art," which got me thinking about some of the other hymns that I really like. I don't have a "favorite" hymn, but I have a few contenders. Here are a few hymns that are dear to me, and some of the reasons why.

The first is "I Need Thee Every Hour." 

I really started to develop a love for the hymns when I was in seminary. My first year of seminary, I had a teacher who was a musical prodigy. He was the first person I ever saw play a piano like this:

Jon Schmidt - not my seminary teacher

(but I wouldn't have complained if he had been)

Since my teacher played the piano so well, we always had superb accompaniment for all the hymns we sang in class (we also had some pretty amazing improvised musical numbers based on popular songs, such as "I Want You Baptized"-  an impromptu parody of "I Want You Back" by NSYNC. OUr teacher could sit down at the piano and play anything. Oh to have that gift!) 

After that year, all of my seminary teachers were non-musical and depended on the students to play the piano. Most of the piano players in my classes stuck to the simplest hymns, and that put "I Need Thee Every Hour" in the regular rotation. At first it was just any old song to me, but as I sang it more often and started memorizing it through repetition, the words started to mean more to me. Then as I grew into adulthood and started facing new adversities and learning more about the Atonement, I began to better understand the sentiment of needing the Savior every hour. 

Favorite lines:

I need the every hour, stay thou nearby. 

Temptations lose their pow'r when thou art nigh.

"In Humility Our Savior" is my favorite sacrament hymn. I don't have an experience or story to go along with this one. It just grew on me over time. I’ve always liked the harmony in this hymn. When we sing it in sacrament meeting, I'm all...

Favorite lines:

Fill our hearts with sweet forgiving;

Teach us tolerance and love.

Let our prayers find access to thee

In thy holy courts above.

I also really like “Love Divine, All Loves Excelling,” which is where the melody for “In Humility Our Savior” comes from. I once had the opportunity to sing it in a choir for stake conference.

Another hymn I love is "Abide with Me; 'Tis Eventide." 

The first time I heard this song, I was at my grandparents' house during General Conference. Several members of my extended family were there watching. My grandpa kept nodding off and snoring pretty loud, which gave everyone a good chuckle. Then the Tabernacle Choir began singing, "Abide with Me; 'Tis Eventide," and my grandpa began singing along with them in his sleep but eventually roused enough to think he'd been awake the whole time and finished the performance. 

I confess, my first time hearing the song, I thought, "Wow, this is nice and boring," but I could tell from my grandpa's singing that he really loved that hymn. From that point on, I thought of it as my grandpa's hymn.

Then when I was in my twenties, I had a difficult experience with my employment, and I was considering quitting my job. It was a really hard choice to make, and I struggled with it for weeks. Finally, one night, I was on my knees trying to pray about it, but I had no words. I didn't know what to ask for. So I just stayed on my knees crying and sang, "Abide with Me; 'Tis Eventide" in my head because that's what came to it. It was all I could do. 

It's been a very tender and special hymn to me ever since. 

(The next morning I walked into work and quit my job. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Three months later, I started a new job that was an absolute joy and blessing to me, and I believe the hand of the Lord was very present in getting me that position). 

Favorite lines:

Abide with me, 'tis eventide. 

Thy walk today with me 

Has made my heart within me burn 

As I communed with thee.

There are many more hymns I love, but these are some of my tops. I'm always excited when I get to church, and there's a song I love on the program.

Music... it is good.

Things from the Past Week That Made Me...

Happy: doing laundry in my new high-capacity washer. I used to have to do 18 loads a week to stay on top of our laundry (it rarely happened). Now I only have to do 9! Same amount of laundry; significantly less time.

Terrified: when I opened my oven and a Pyrex dish exploded at me. I was baking some butternut squash to make Tomato Bisque, and things went awry.

Grossed out: when Zoe puked all over the kitchen floor at my in-laws' house.

Confused: watching hair tutorials. My mind can't make sense of them. There are some braids I've been wanting to learn for years (having three daughters and all), but I can't comprehend hair tutorials. Example.

Mad: when I'm trying to play Solitaire on my phone, and an ad comes up that never has an X to close it. I have to close out the app entirely to get it to go away. Grumble, grumble.

Laugh: Eva loudly yelling 'penis' in her sweet, little voice repeatedly on Saturday night. Scotty and I had to control ourselves as we explained to her that she can't yell 'penis,' but as soon as we were in a different room, we both lost it.

Eva: Comedienne Extraordinaire  

Inspired: finishing the Book of Mormon again over the weekend.

Cozy: wrapping my cold feet in my favorite heating pad.

Rejoice: a bowl of vanilla ice cream with berries on top. You know when you eat something, and it's, like, ten times better than you imagined? That was my bowl of ice cream.

Tired: running the kids around from place to place. Sitting in the driver's seat for hours on end is exhausting. Wednesday is my biggest "run around" day, so Thursday is usually a welcome respite.

Geek out: playing back to back games of Wingspan against Scotty and Nicky and then watching a few episodes of Lost  wherein we learn the fates of the Oceanic Six.

A little Sayid humor for you

Valentine's Day Re-Cap

My kids didn't have school on Friday, which meant we had to got to spend Valentine's Day together. Sometimes when my kids are out of school, I attack the day like I'd attack a teriyaki char burger from The Habit. Other times, I lock myself in my room while my kids spend all day fighting, Then when Scotty gets home, I take out all my parenting angst on him.

On Friday, I took the teriyaki char burger approach.

I took my kids out in public and everything!

But first, let me tell you about my tragic Valentine's Day accident. I had good intentions of staying up late Thursday night and decorating my kids' bedroom doors with hearts and loving messages. I also had some fun heart-shaped balloons I wanted to blow up and scatter around the living room floor.

Well... I forgot.

So Friday morning at 6:30 after I got back from my morning walk, I was trying to discreetly blow up balloons in my bedroom. The balloons looked best when they were blown up as big as possible, therefore, maintaining their heart shape. As I was working on a balloon, I grew confident that I could put just a little more air in it.

Yeah... it popped. It made a loud BOOM! which woke up all my kids. The balloon whacked me in the face and snapped both my eyeballs. I fell over backwards on my bed and notified Scotty that I was going to die. It hurt for about five minutes, but I maintained my vision, so there's hope for me yet.

A little later in the morning, we went to the Church History Museum to check out the new children's exhibit "Temples Dot the Earth."

It's really cute. The Church History Museum is free, so keep that in mind if you live nearby and need something to do with the family. 

From there we walked over to Scotty's work for lunch. The cafeteria was giving away free chocolate-covered strawberries, so my girls were ecstatic. We also got free drinks and free fruit. As we were finishing up our lunch, a senior sister missionary came up to our table and insisted on buying ice cream for the kids. It warmed my heart and made me laugh. "I'm a grandma, so I need to buy these kids some ice cream!" she said. 

After lunch the kids wanted to go to the Disney Store, so we walked over to City Creek and scoped out the Disney merch. Then we went to Claire's where they were doing a big clearance clean-out, so I let the girls each pick out six items to buy. 

By the time we left the mall, it was 2:30 in the afternoon, and I was pleased that we'd stayed busy enough to waste a typical Friday's worth of school time (Nicky gets out at 12:30 on Fridays, and my girls get out at 1:15). 

On the way home, I stopped at the mailbox and found this gem from my friend Lynsie. 

For my best bosom buddy -

Q: What did one saggy boobie say to the other saggy boobie?

A: If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts!

Stay lifted and toned my friend!

And that is how Lynsie won Valentine's Day. 

When we got home, I let my kids watch some TV while I read a book for a few minutes. Then I had my kids decorate some foam hearts (the ones I was going to decorate their doors with), and we went to my mother-in-law's house to "heart attack" her front door. I knew she was home, and I knew she'd catch us, so I texted her beforehand and told her to ignore us. That way my kids could enjoy the illusion of completing a "secret surprise." We even did an elaborate getaway where I drove the van away as fast as I could with the door still open. The kids bought it! They think we are sneaky as can be!

When we got home, I made some mashed potatoes to take to my mom's house. My mom hosted Valentine's Day dinner with my brothers. I had my first experience with crab legs. 

My verdict: I can't work that hard for food!

Scotty says that if we ever have crab again, he'll do the work for me. Now that's true love! 

We had a great day full of love and fun activities. 

Then I remembered that my kids still had three days home from school (insert distressed emoji face). 

Love Questions

Since tomorrow is Valentine's Day, I thought I'd pay tribute to MY LOVE (that's Scotty - just to be clear) with a couple's questionnaire.

----------

How did you meet? We met at church. More specifically, youth conference. I was 12, and he was 15. Our ward went to a ropes course, and we were in the same group. Scotty didn't really catch my eye, though, until I was a much older and wiser 14. Red more here.

Who was interested first? I would say me.

What was your first date? We went to a restaurant called Pardners (now closed) for Scotty's high school graduation. His mom and step-dad took us. Does that count as a real date? Probably not. But in our upbringing, we were discouraged from dating before age 16, and I was only 15, so therefore... parents. Haha! Then we went to Scotty's house and watched Summer of the Monkeys. Which is a movie I never in my life would have picked to watch (now I have a long list of such movies that my mother-in-law has made me watch throughout the years).

How long have you been married? Almost 17 years.

May 9, 2003

Who said 'I love you' first? He did.

Who is taller? Scotty is 6'2" and I am 5'7".

Who is more impatient? Me.

Our first Christmas (married)

Who is more sensitive? Me.

Who's louder? I don't think either of us is very loud.

Who's more stubborn? Me again.

Who falls asleep first? Scotty. No question.

Halloween Two Thousand Something

Who wakes up first? We alternate.

Did you go to the same high school? Yes, but not at the same time.

Where do you eat out most as a couple? Probably Thai Delight and Red Robin.

Where is the farthest you have traveled as a couple? Eastern Caribbean on our honeymoon.

One of many Disneyland adventures

Who is more social? We are probably equal, but we socialize in different ways. I do more organized socializing while Scotty is more social with servers, cashiers, etc.

Who is more competitive? We are different in the ways that we are competitive, but we are equal in the amount of competitiveness. The worst disagreements of our marriage have involved board games.

Who is the neat freak? None of the above. We are not neat freaks at all.

Who hogs the bed? Scotty and his gigantic body pillow! (He will argue this. He is wrong).

2012

Who does the laundry? I do 75%, he does 25%.

Who drives when you are together? Scotty. He's a control freak when it comes to driving.

Who is the first to admit they are wrong? I'm never wrong, so this question is non-applicable.

Me doing my "I'm never wrong" jig

Happy Valentine's Day, my friends!

I would pay someone to bring me ice water in bed right now (and ten other random facts)

Fact #1: This week has been really busy. The "B" word. Eek! But really, there has been a lot going on this week. Some of my obligations wrapped up today, so Friday is going to be pretty chill. I'm looking forward to it. But Saturday and Sunday are going to be pretty packed with things. Good things, but things nonetheless.

Fact #2: This morning I stabbed myself in the finger with an exacto knife. It was a brand new blade and sharp as can be, so it went through my skin quickly and precisely. The puncture was really tiny, but it was deep, and it bled a lot.

Fact #3: I was using the exacto knife to cut out a cardboard detective I made for White Ribbon Week at the elementary school.

Fact #4: Scotty seems to believe that I cut myself a lot.

Scotty might be right. But don't tell him that.

Fact #5: Zoe's dentist appointment went okay on Tuesday. She had six teeth pulled, and her mouth bled for the rest of the day (some of which ended up on my throw pillows). Bleeding from the mouth was a little traumatizing for her and for me because it brought back some anxieties from when her tonsils hemorrhaged, but by Wednesday, everything was great! The cash from the tooth fairy definitely helped Zoe in her recovery!

Zoe in a post-sedation haze

Fact #6: On Monday we got quite a bit of snow here. Many school districts called for a snow day. Our district didn't, but they did call for a two-hour late start and didn't take attendance. 

We were mean and made our kids go to school. Scotty was able to work from home, so he did all the driving in the truck. Otherwise I would have kept the kids home.

Fact #7: The power went out at Nicky's school shortly after he arrived, so Scotty went back and got him and our two neighbor girls. Daisy and Zoe stayed at school all day. There was an average of five kids per class. Preschool was canceled for Eva.

Fact #8: After school there was plenty of time to play in the snow.

Workouts for dads

Fact #9: My friend Christie's birthday was a few weeks ago. In trying to find her a birthday gift, I stumbled across a Fat Thor pin on etsy. Christie loves Chris Hemsworth. Actually, "loves" isn't a strong enough word. There might not be a word for what Christie feels toward Chris Hemsworth. When we went to see Endgame, and it showed Thor having "let himself go," Christie grabbed my arm and didn't release her death grip for about ten minutes. She was laughing so hard that after the movie, the people down the row from us stopped us and told us how they couldn't stop laughing at Christie. 

So, of course, I had to get her the Fat Thor pin. 

Fact #10: But just to make it all the more fun, I spent a week collecting all the pieces I would need to dress up like Fat Thor and meet Christie at Cafe Rio for lunch. 

I sat in my car waiting for Christie to arrive... lookin' all fine... like this:

Nothin' weird going on here

Then when Christie pulled in the parking lot, I jumped out of the car and struck my best Thor pose... 

...and she didn't even look at me!

So I had to run across the parking lot to find her. 

Good times. Now let me know if you need to borrow my beard or my belly. 

Currently {February 2020 Edition}

Reading: The Ten Thousand Doors of January by Alix E. Harrow. I'm about 50 pages in. I'm having a hard time getting into it, but I try to give books at least 100 pages, so there's still time.

Listening to: The Book of Mormon off and on. I am aiming to finish it again by the end of February to earn an Honor Bee before they are obsolete. I alternate between reading my physical copy, reading on my phone, and listening to the audio. I do whatever works best for my schedule each day. 

Eating: Chick-Fil-A. There has been an abundance of free food offerings in recent weeks that I just can't refuse. Give me all the chickens!

Buying: A couch for the basement. This is big news! The purchase has been made, and the couch is on the premises. However, the basement is not done. We had to buy the couch though, because it's from Costco, and we had to get it while they had it in stock.

Watching: Veronica Mars (second time).

Singing: "Lost in the Woods" from Frozen II. It just cracks me up - Kristoff channeling his inner Chicago.

Stressing about: nothing right this moment because I'm ahead of this week's projects. However, that could change at any moment. In fact, it will change any moment because I'm pushing the limits on getting up and getting ready today (it's 6:43 a.m). I need to pack Nicky's lunch for school, and he leaves in a few minutes. Then I have to get all the girls ready and head out early to drop Daisy and Eva off to other people so I can take Zoe to the dentist to have six teeth pulled.

Ok. I'm stressed now.

Craving: nothing. That's weird.

Playing: Minesweeper. Scotty downloaded it on his phone which made me want to download it on my phone, and now I'm reliving my childhood in the best of ways. I am also loving my new board game, Wingspan.

Annoyed by: my kids. I love them so much, but they annoy the heck out of me.

Excited for: this.

Dreading: the time it takes for Zoe's sedation to kick in before she has her teeth pulled. Oi! I am paying the extra money for sedation since she had so much trauma with her tonsils. I feel horrible that she has to have more work done in the mouth. We have to get those teeth out, though. I've post-poned it too long.

Grateful for: shelter, food, and transportation.

(Pretend I included some fun pictures and gifs. Gotta go!)