Thursday, April 19, 2018

Spontaneity, where art thou?

I don't know if the word spontaneous has ever been an appropriate word to describe me. I mean... sometimes I do things unexpectedly and on the fly, but other times I really need to plan and prepare. Perhaps I'm just the right amount of spontaneous. Maybe I'm responsibly spontaneous.

Who am I kidding? I have no idea what I am!

I do know one thing, though... when it comes to socializing, I've become a lot less spontaneous as I've gotten older. 

Why am I even talking about this?

Because last night I drove past the house of a friend, and something told me to stop. I had this vision of going to her door and saying, "Let's just hang out. SPONTANEOUSLY!" and then we sit on her front lawn for hours while the kids run around and we just talk and laugh, and we let it get dark, and we don't worry that there's school tomorrow. We just allow the time pass, and we end up staying outside for way too long and getting mosquito bites, but it doesn't matter because it's good for both our souls, and every time we scratch, we remember that we were bitten during good times.  

I debated whether this was possible. I even drove past her house again a little while later, telling myself that if she were outside, that would be my "sign." 

She wasn't outside.

I didn't stop.

But I wish I could have. I was too worried about interrupting her evening or being met with rejection. Are those the right reasons to not attempt a spontaneous visit to a friend? I don’t really know.

Maybe I'll try it some other time but with planning and prep work and well... no spontaneity whatsoever.

1 comment:

love.joy.lane said...

I loved this post.

I get it...

I want it to.