Sunday, November 28, 2021

An Incomplete List of Awkward Situations (Part II)

Approaching a school crosswalk when there's a crossing guard and no kids, and you're like, "So, uh... do I make my own road-crossing decisions here, or are you the responsible party?"

Trying to get out of the Jungle Cruise boat before the cast members "help" you out. 

Exiting the aisle of the grocery store, but because you have a gigantic grocery cart in front of you, you can’t see the cross traffic, and you just have to go for it and hope no one t-bones you. 

Saying "Hey Siri" when you're talking to Alexa. Not to mention trying to remember when you have to say “Hey” and when you don’t. 

Spilling something on your boob.

Tie dying a shirt and ending up with the swirls on your boobs.

When a child puts a sticker on your boob. 

When someone else's kid nuzzles your boob. 

Having boobs. 

When you go to McDonald's, and you still have the garbage in your cup holder from your last trip to McDonald's.

When you take your second trip to McDonald's in one day, and the shift hasn't changed yet.

When you go to Chick-Fil-A, and you have McDonald's garbage in your car, and you're like, "I don't know where this came from! I didn't go there, I swear!”

When you go to Chick-Fil-A, and one of your former Sunday School students works there, and you’re like, “Oh heeeeey! I didn’t know you worked here! It’s so good to see you!” And they’re like, “What’s the name on you’re order?” And you’re like, “Okay then…”

When you go to Chick-Fil-A, and they don’t say “My pleasure,” and it’s all you can think about as you drive away.

When you see someone from high school that you were really good friends with but haven’t seen for 18 years, and they call you by your best friend’s name, and you decide you’ll just be Michelle from now on.

And for my husband…

When someone calls and asks you for a blessing, and you bring another priesthood holder with you to help, and then that other priesthood holder toots and says “Oops!” in the middle of the prayer (true story). 

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