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September Writing Challenge #8:

Leader

I don’t know what I had in mind when I added the word “leader” to my list of prompts, but it’s ended up being one of the prompts I’ve come to dread. Truth is, I’m serving in a leadership position in my Church currently, and I’m struggling with it. I’ve had this calling (working with the teenage girls) for nine months, and it’s been really, really hard for me. I used to think I was a good leader, but it seems the purpose of my current Church calling is for God to beat me down. It’s uncomfortable, and I don’t like it. I feel completely unfit for this gig.  

Several months ago, when I was new to the calling ("calling" is the word we use for "unpaid church job," basically), a lady came to one of our Relief Society weeknight activities and did a bread demonstration. She told us that she serves in Young Women in her ward and that she loves it so much and would stay there the rest of her life, if she could. I immediately thought, something's wrong with me. Why don't I feel like that? 

That's all to say that I regret putting "leader" on my prompt list, but I'm forcing myself to use it so it doesn't taunt me all month. 

Instead of writing about my own experiences as a Young Women leader, let me tell you some fun memories I have of my leaders when I was a teenager.

(Names have been changed to protect the innocent).

Leader Margie had amazing handwriting and was incredibly organized. She took pictures at all of our activities and printed them out for us and made scrapbook pages. She trained us to be leaders, and our class presidency meetings and Personal Progress program ran like a machine. If I have any good leadership skills acquired from my youth, I definitely learned them from Margie. In fact, Margie might be part of my problem because I want Young Women to be exactly how it was with Margie in charge. 

Leader Tallulah was our sports director. When teaching us to play volleyball, she once put her baby in the middle of us all and said, "Don't let the ball hit my baby!" And we didn't! Nowadays that's probably child abuse, but back then, it's the kind of stuff sports movies were made of. We didn't let that ball anywhere near that baby! 

Leader Ellen was always spoiling us with goodies. I still remember a chocolate cake she brought to an activity that was wrapped in pirouette cookies. I've always wanted that cake again. Ellen was single and our oldest leader. My friends and I were riding in her car to girls' camp one year when we saw horses mating. We all busted up laughing, and Ellen said, "What? Haven't you ever seen horses having sex before?" and we just about died. Within ten minutes we saw cows mating, and we were all screaming as teenage girls are wont to do, and Ellen said, "Yup, cows have sex, too!" A few minutes after that, Ellen missed our exit and yelled out, "Shit!" then made the most abrupt and illegal u-turn I've ever seen in my life. I sure learned a lot from Ellen.

Leader Linda was a "young" leader. I didn't know at the time just how young leaders were when they were in their 20's. I loved Linda's car. It was a forest green Saturn SL2 with a spoiler on the back. I always said I wanted to own the same kind of car Linda had. Six years later, I did!

Leader Tanya was our camp director most years I was in Young Women. She was superb, and of course, I want all girls' camps to run just like Tanya ran them. Tanya was a riot! She was always a lot of fun, and she had a bit of a crazy streak. One time, when I was in her car driving to camp, she hit a post on the side of the road and just kept on driving. She scratched the entire side of her new car! Tanya made us gather around and listen to her tell the Mike and Tanya Love Story at camp every year. Tanya had a baby when she was young, and then she met and married Mike. He adopted her daughter, and then they adopted another daughter together. One time, some of my church friends and I stumbled across a couple having sex in the back seat of a car in the church parking lot. We ran to Tanya in a panic, and she said, "Oh, dear! That's how I got Sara!"

Leader Mary was a red-headed British woman (who happened to be a distant cousin of mine by marriage). She had the most delightful accent, and she spoiled us rotten. Like Ellen, she was always giving us goodies, and everyone knew that if you got to ride in Mary's car to an activity, you were likely to stop for a treat somewhere. Mary had the most amazing backyard with a trampoline in the ground, and she taught us how to make Pysanky eggs.

I could easily list ten more Young Women leaders whom I admire, but I'll stick with these six for now. I was very blessed to have such excellent role models in my life - even the swearing, law-breaking ones that taught me the birds and the bees on the street. 

(I'm suddenly wondering if I took the right approach to that chastity lesson I taught a couple months ago).

This summer I went to girls' camp as a leader for the first time in 17 years. Two of the stake camp directors happened to be my former Young Women leaders, one of whom was Leader Linda. I went up to her after a few days at camp and said, "Leader Linda, I would like to apologize to you for anything I did as a Young Woman that made you tired or sad!" and she just started laughing and gave me a big hug.