Currently {July 2019 Edition}

Reading: Lie to Me by J.T. Ellison, A Case for the Book of Mormon by Tad Callister, and Intuitive Eating by Tribole and Resch. I've been in a real reading rut lately. I haven't finished a book since April. I started A Case for the Book of Mormon in April and then haven't picked it up again until now. I have been reading Intuitive Eating for over a year, but that's a good thing because it's meant to be read and implemented over time and not rushed through.

Watching: I don't even want to tell you - it's too embarrassing.

Singing: "This Is Me." I saw a post about Keala Settle being at the Grand Californian this morning.

Stressing about: Junior high. Because my son is going to junior high. And I can't even.

Wearing: my bathrobe. Because I just got out of the shower. My bathrobe was on clearance at IKEA, and it's green. So I look like the Jolly Green Giant with a hair turban.

Craving: sleep. It's 9:06 a.m. and I've already attempted to nap, but I was brutally awoken by a child who wanted a sippy cup of  milk.

Excited for: a lunch date with Scotty in two hours. These days our dates mostly consist of going to the grocery store without the kids. I'm grateful that we've reached the phase in life where we can do that, but it's all we can fit in as far as spending time alone together. So an actual date, quick as it will be, is a real treat!

Trying: to ignore the fact that my kid are downstairs doing pancake art challenges and probably making a huge mess that I'll spend hours fighting them to clean up.

Feeling: tired and run down, which is really sad because that's what I wrote the last time I did this, and I really don't want to feel tired and run down so consistently.

I guess I can also say I feel guilty, which isn't much better, but at least it's slightly different. I feel guilty for having such a good life while it seems everyone around me is deeply struggling. I'm struggling, too, but not in the ways some of my friends and neighbors are.

Suffering from: sweat. Tis the season. If I so much as blink, I start sweating.

Buying: only what I need... in theory.

Annoyed by: everything. Yesterday I told Scotty that I need to go to the mountains for two weeks to get away from society and detox.

Missing: Hugh Jackman.

Loving: that my kids are getting old enough to play board games and actually challenge me. Nicky beats me at Splendor all the time, and the other day he beat me at Catan. Last week we found Super Scrabble at the thrift store, which is amazing because it's hard to find a functional Scrabble board at a thrift store (the tiles are always missing) let alone, a super-sized one! I taught him how to play and allowed him to use an online dictionary to help him find words. He was pretty excited about "poop," though he didn't actually get to play the word.

Frustrated by: public shaming as a societal norm. I am so tired of people turning to the internet to mock and degrade each other. I think one of the biggest ailments of our time is the lack of forgiveness and compassion we have for one another. And I'm just as guilty as anyone else.

Learning: nothing. I can feel myself getting dumber as summer goes on.

Thankful for: my mind. One of my biggest fears (of which I have a million) is traumatic brain injuries, and I am always thinking about what it would be like if I (or someone I loved) had an injury or illness that affected personality or memory. I thank God regularly for being of sound mind.