Things I Didn't Buy From the Thrift Store: A Photo Essay

 Educational materials for a certain demographic:

Frankly, I'm shocked to see that this is the 8th edition, which means there were seven editions before this one!

A gag gift that I probably could benefit from:

Fancy dressed monkey:

A lot of personality in one homemade plushie:

What does it all mean? So many details!

My kids knew what this was, but I don't:

None of us knew what this was:

Vintage missionary plaque:

I remember stuff like this hanging on my cousins' walls.

Dog dress:

Not to be confused with a dress for dogs.

Creepy clown plate:

A Norman Rockwell painting that never should have been. The kid's eyes are pleading for help. 

A framed photo of a dog family:

A single mom who works two jobs. 

A Wishbone book:

What's the story, Wishbone?

A waddle of penguins:

Yes, I had to google that.

A terra cotta Bob Ross bust:

It's actually a Chia pet!

A multi-colored cow outfit:

Imagine you own an ice cream shop, and I stand outside wearing this to convince people to buy your ice cream.

Cowboy ducks:

One for me and one for you. 

This amazing doll:

I think she's wearing my aunt Clara's wig.

Harry Styles shoes:

A Shein special. 

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As a bonus, here is what Daisy didn't buy from the thrift store:

Shame on her! This was a winner! She did have a point, though, when she said she didn’t like the flamingo’s neck placement. 

Things I Didn’t Buy From the Thrift Store: A Photo Essay

This lovely set of witches that look like they’ve had their faces smashed in:

A brown denim inspired set of kitchenware that was much more elaborate than what you see here: 

Seriously, it had everything from plates to mugs to a gravy boat. And some of the pieces had names on them! 

This splendid piece of pottery: 

Is it Rafiki? No really, tell me. Is it? 

Tampons: 

They had so many tampons. So many. 

My kitchen table:

It’s always trippy to see your own stuff for sale at the thrift store. They wanted sixty bucks for that thing! I wanted to talk to a manager and say, “Um, I owned that, and it should not be $60!”

This floral couch:

I actually love old couches like these so much and might someday drag one home . Scotty will be thrilled. 

This ceramic kangaroo? Bunny? Rat? Mystery animal:

I love that it matches the couch. They should sell them in a set. Yellow couch + yellow creature. 

This ceramic bison: 

I almost bought it to put in someone’s yard, but I got distracted and forgot about it. 

A camel candle: 

I regret not buying this one. Someone out there would have loved this with a “Happy Hump Day” card. Lost opportunity. Frankly, I’m embarrassed. 

A toilet brush holder: 

I didn’t realize it was a toilet brush holder until

I’d already held it. Ew. But also, I’m not a germaphobe, so whatever. My hands are washable. 

A toilet timer: 

 

I almost got it for Scotty. He could benefit from a limit. 

This baby doll: 

It had some excellent teeth marks in it. 

This photo: 

A Best Mom Ever mug: 

You can’t tell from the photo, but the wording is totally off center. Like my soul. 

This book based on the Weirdest Movie of All Time: 

 

Please tell me you watched this as a child. 

And last of all, a book about how to make your husband not lazy (written by a man):