"Extended families should lend support when needed."
I am 31 years old (and close enough to 32 that I should probably round up), and I still have three living grandparents.
That's pretty incredible!
In 1900, the average life expectancy was only 49 years. Now it's 77 (Miller and Yorgason, 2012). In 1900, less than 40% of people still had a living parent at age 50 (Uhlenberg, 1996). Currently, a 20-year-old is more likely to have a living grandmother (91%) than a 20-year-old was to have a living mother in 1900 (83%) (Miller and Yorgason, 2012).
With the increased life span of modern-days, we are blessed to have our grandparents around longer. What an amazing thing to have those lasting inter-generational relationships in this mortal journey.
This is a four-generation photo with my
grandma, my mom, myself, and Daisy.
This is the only four-generation line
of girls in my family.
When I was growing up, I had special relationships with my grandparents on both sides of the family. My grandparents were always involved in my life, and they played a very important role in my childhood.
When my parents got divorced, my dad moved in with his parents for a while. I had the chance to stay at my grandma's house with my dad on the weekends. This helped me see past some of the initial difficulties of going though a divorce. I got to sleep over at Grandma's house! All the time!
Shortly after the divorce, my mom moved into a house directly across the street from her parents' house. From the time I was seven years old, I could simply jot across the street to my grandparents' house any time I wanted, and I made a habit of doing this several times a week.
I wish I could name everything my grandparents have done for me throughout my life so I could adequately portray the magnitude of their influence, but the list is far too long. Suffice it to say that they have done countless good on my behalf, and I love them dearly.
My children have likewise been blessed with living grandparents. Lots and lots of them! Since both Scotty's and my parents are remarried, our children have four sets of grandparents. Our moms live in the same neighborhood we do, and our dads are both a short 15 minutes away.
We feel so fortunate to have them all so close. I don't know how I could ever raise these children without them! They provide traditions, unconditional love, and sometimes even refuge. They've saved my sanity countless times when I've been overwhelmed.
Plus, my kids adore their grandparents!
There are a lot of benefits to having grandparents involved in the lives of children. Children who experience emotional closeness to their grandparents are shown to have reduced acting-out behaviors such as sexual promiscuity, drug abuse, and delinquency. They have fewer symptoms of depression, and they have better prosocial behaviors such as wanting to help others (Miller and Yorgason, 2012).
Grandparents are truly a gift. I'm so grateful for the impact my own grandparents have had on my life, and I'm equally grateful for the role my children's grandparents are currently playing in their lives.
Grandparents, you rock! Thank you for all you do.
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This post was inspired by "Supporting Families Across Generations," by Richard B. Miller and Jeremy B. Yorgason, published in Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives, 2012. This piece of writing is part of my Family Proclamation project for FAML 100 at Brigham Young University Idaho.
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