“I feel like sitting on the toilet and reading a magazine.”
-Zoe
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“Wow. Mom, those are some nice boobs you have.”
-Eva
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“I didn’t know Danny DeVito was a real person!”
-Daisy
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Me: Zoe, would you like to pick a song for us to sing at your baptism?
Zoe: Yes. “Mary Had a Little Lamb.”
Me: That’s a great song, but since it’s a baptism, we should probably sing a church song.
Zoe: It is a church song! It’s about Mary!
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“Mom, will you buy me a nutcracker so I can crunch my nuts?”
-Eva
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Daisy: Do you know what VIP stands for?
Zoe: Yep. Employee of the month!
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“Mom, I was crying in my bed because there was a hamburger tornado in my dream.”
-Eva
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"I know how to spell coffee... E-E-F-F-O-C."
-Eva
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