Dear Ann Landers

The other day I posted some images from a newspaper I found, dated May 26, 1967. My favorite part of the newspaper is the Ann Landers column.

   

A brief internet-researched history on Ann Landers:

 The Ann Landers advice column ran for 56 years in newspapers across the United States. At the time of this column, Ann Landers was Esther Lederer. Esther is responsible for your fear of Halloween candy. Remember the razor blades and the poison? (I sure do). Those rumors were a result of Ann Landers writing that, "In recent years, there have been reports of people with twisted minds putting razor blades and poison in taffy apples and Halloween candy. It is no longer safe to let your child eat treats that come from strangers." She was also responsible for the rumor that birds explode when they eat rice.

 The column in the Salt Lake Tribune on May 26, 1967 included this letter:

 

Dear Ann Landers, I don't sleep in my wife's night-gowns, nor do I wear her girdle, but if I did, I can't see that it would be any of your business - or anyone else's for that matter. Recently I had an experience along these lines and it burned me up. I have been having trouble with my ankles lately, a general weakness of the muscles. My podiatrist suggested that I walk around the house in my wife's high heels for an hour or two during the evening. The other night the kid who delivers papers came to collect. I answered the door in my wife's high heels. The boy almost died laughing, and now it is all over the nieghborhood. Why are people so eager to put two and two together and get six? I hope you will print my letter and open a few eyes. - NORMAL NORMAN

When I read this letter, I was so excited to see what Ann Landers' response would be. Here it what she said:

 

I don't know what I expected, but I was kind of surprised. I guess I thought she'd be nicer (but then again, I didn't know Ann Landers very well). If I had been Ann Landers, this would have been my response (yes, I've thought about this thoroughly):

Dear Norman, My greatest concern in reading your letter is that your podiatrist has misled you. It is 1967, and the average shoe size for women is 6 while the average shoe size for men is 10. A size 10 foot can not fit in a size 6 shoe - no matter the extent of ankle pain. A good podiatrist wouldn't tell you to wear your wife's high heels when, clearly, you need to buy your own.