When you have to use the bathroom at someone's house, and they direct you to a restroom that's right off their kitchen, and you can hear everyone in the kitchen talking, and it feels like you're peeing in the middle of a dinner party, and you think, "If I can hear them, they can hear me!" and you become hyper aware of every sound coming from your body.
When you approach the pharmacy counter, and you want to make sure the techs know you're there, but you don't want to look too antsy, so you strategically position yourself so they can see you, but they keep shifting ever so slightly so you're blocked from view by the privacy partition, so you have to shift to where they can see you in their peripherals while still putting on the air of, "It's cool, I know you're busy, so I'm just going to stand here all casual-like, but also, hurry up, let's get this show on the road."
When you're walking out to your amazing parking spot at Costco, and you end up with two different people waiting for you to back out of it so they can take it, and you feel like you have to offer mediation between all parties so they don't fight in front of you like your parents did as a child.
When you're at a social event and everyone is talking about how much they hate McDonald's, and you're secretly wishing you could leave and go use your McDonald's app to get your daily large fries for $1.
When you wake up to a text message with six pictures of someone's elbow x-rays from Oklahoma and a voicemail from an x-ray technician asking if you received said x-rays, and you think, "Either they have the wrong number, or I forgot I went to medical school."
When you're singing your heart out at church, and you accidentally sing the wrong line of the hymn, but you catch yourself during the first syllable and try to act like you were singing it right all along.
When you push a 300 pound shopping cart around every aisle at Sam's Club, and then you check your fitness watch and see that you only went .19 miles, but it felt like at least five!
When you’re using a public restroom, and there’s someone in a stall talking on their phone, and you wonder if you’re allowed to flush the toilet or not.
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