Thursday, December 20, 2018

Christmas is Coming, the Goose is Getting Fat (and ten other random facts)

Fact #1: I love the Christmas season, but I'm not sure it's worth the daily horror I'm experiencing with my kids. They are full of the Spirit of December... which I'm pretty sure is evil... like the fruits of the devil.

Fact #2: I'm trying to be more optimistic in my day to day life, so from now on, when my laundry pile looks like this (which is always), I'm going to think "Look how much TV I get to watch!" instead of thinking "Look how much laundry I have to fold!"

December 2018

Fact #3: Last week we had our 7th ER visit of 2018. In previous years, we've averaged a visit about every 1.5 years. I don't know what changed this year, but we really upped our game!

Fact #4:  The reason we went to the ER was because Nicky hit his face on the back of one of our kitchen chairs. He looked like Quasimodo immediately, so I took him to Instacare just for peace of mind. 
{actual image of my son post-injury}

I expected them to say, "Everything is okay! Give him ibuprofen and put an ice pack on it." Instead they said, "He has air pockets in there and probably fractured his face. He needs to go to the ER and have a CT." 

Fortunately, there was no fracture.

Fact #5: This morning I went to the store for what will hopefully be THE LAST TIME until after Christmas. I always feel like I'm prepping for the Apocalypse when I grocery shop for the holidays. At this point, if we don't have it, we will have to either live without it or steal it from a neighbor. I can't go out in public anymore.

Fact #6: I have a habit of eating toast late at night. I was trying to quit this ritual, for health reasons, but then last night, I slipped and made toast, and my squeezable jam plopped out in the shape of a horse:

December 2018

Fact #7: I'm pretty sure that means I should eat toast late at night for the rest of my days. 

Fact #8: I don't care what this company thinks. Ain't no one putting fresh grapes in the roasting pan with the turkey!

December 2018

Fact #9: I hate when my kids take pictures of me because I always end up looking like this:

Family Portraits
"Give me my phone!"
Or this:

Pictures my kids take of me
"Who wants to give Mommy her phone?"
Or this:

Pictures my kids take of me
"Give me my phone! NOW!"

Fact #10: It's great knowing that's what I look like to them. Can't a mom just get her phone back?

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