Me (singing): We only got four minutes to save the world!
Zoe: Four minutes? That isn’t very much time. You should have at least four decades to save the world!
—————
Eva: I’m going to brush my hair for 25 minutes.
(She didn’t brush her hair at all. Never does).
—————
Zoe: The purpose of dance is to twerk in front of boys you love.
—————
Me: Cell phones used to only be for emergencies, and they couldn’t take pictures.
Eva: That’s dumb. Whoever made those phones made really bad choices.
—————
Zoe (in the van): It smells like an old woman in here.
—————
Zoe: I only kiss things that don’t have bark on them.
—————
Zoe (to her primary teacher who gave her a magazine at church): Magazines are really good for when I’m constipated and I have to wait a while for my poop to come out.
—————
Nicky: I didn’t get a single wiener drawn in my yearbook this year.
—————
Me (singing Bohemian Rhapsody): Mama! Ooo-ooo-ooo!
Eva: Why are you singing a song about Grandma?
—————
Me: You should go for a bike ride.
Daisy: I’d rather eat carrots.
—————
Eva (to me while I watch a period drama): Why do you watch so many shows with boring colors?
No comments:
Post a Comment