Personal Progress Update

In February I started working on earning a Young Women medallion.This is an award that can be earned in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. The program is also referred to as "Personal Progress." It's specifically geared toward teenage girls, but anyone can earn one. I earned mine when I was 17 and have always wanted to do it again. The program has changed a lot since then and will undergo more changes as the Church engages in a new youth initiative starting next year.

Last month the idea to do Personal Progress came to me with a bit of intensity. I tend to get a bee in my bonnet at times and then end up getting burned out, so I didn't want to jump into it only to realize I put too much pressure on myself. Mostly, I wanted to make sure that Personal Progress wouldn't prevent me from doing other important things. I could imagine myself working on a PP project and yelling at my kids, "Leave me alone! Can't you see I'm doing Personal Progress?"

I prayed about it, and every response in my heart and head was, "Yes! Do this!" I also had the reassurance from the Spirit that I'm good at Personal Progress. It suits my personality. I rocked it as a teenager, and I can rock it as an overweight 35-year-old stay-at-home-mother of four who has to take antidepressants and high blood pressure meds to make it through each day.

So I went and bought a hard copy of the book (because I need to be able to write in the margins), I made a plan, and I got started. I created a google doc for my PP journal, and I hung a bunch of post-its on my bedroom wall so I could remember what I'm working on.

Scotty and I now have a Sunday ritual of going through my PP book and signing off the requirements I complete each week. I'm almost done with all the value experiences and am now starting some of my value projects (I have to complete seven ten-hour projects and read the Book of Mormon, among other things).

If you're not familiar with Personal Progress, a lot of the requirements are centered around studying certain topics in the scriptures - the Holy Ghost, for example - and then taking specific actions, having discussions, and/or writing in a journal. Some requirements are flexible, and some you get to pick and choose. I love the adaptability of the program, and I've really tried to make it into something that supports what I really need in my current phase of life.

Some of the things I've done with Personal Progress are:

• Worked on implementing the Come Follow Me curriculum in my life (this has been a struggle for me. I've been very resistant to it)
• Worked on improving the relationship with one of my children
• Talked to my kids about suicide
• Reviewed my patriarchal blessing
• Compiled and tested healthy recipes for my family (so far only 2 are "keepers")
• Cut back on my swearing (I'm not 100% successful, but Scotty can attest to my improved language)
• Made meal plans and stuck with them
• Reduced how often I eat out
• Made centerpieces for a community event
• Took my kids around the neighborhood with their friends to pick up garbage
• Worked on improving my fasting
• Started reading the Book of Mormon again

I secretly hoped that as I worked on PP that it would change my life - more specifically, that it would change me. I've been in some serious spiritual funk off and on for the last several years. I've felt stagnant, and I don't like that. I want to feel like I'm moving. I want to grow and progress, and I need to perceive that growth.

That was my hope. That something meaningful would happen. But I'll be honest, what I really believed would happen was that Personal Progress would be nice. I'd get it done, get my necklace, and move on with my life without anything tremendous taking place.

My belief was wrong, and my hope is being fulfilled. I've felt a degree of personal growth that is profound, and I have witnessed miracles.

Now here is the part where I wish I could tell you all the things that have happened, but there just aren't words. The emotion I feel is so strong that I can't release it. I just have to hold it.

What I can say is that I've felt an increased measure of the Spirit, and I've had knowledge come to me in significant ways when I've needed it. I've also experienced innumerable service opportunities.

I'm excited to be doing something good for me, but the best thing about it has been the ripple effect as it extends to my family and others. I feel like I'm no longer stagnant.