My Life The Musical

Last week was a very musical week. It started with the Donny & Marie concert (I'm still on a Donny high). Then Scotty, Nicky, and I went to Hale Theater to see Newsies, which was FANTASTIC!!! I was only able to stop singing "Carrying the Banner" because we went to see Mama Mia, and I transitioned to "Super Trouper."

Being so heavily saturated in song and dance made me realize how terribly unfair it is that real life isn't a musical. Surely God could have worked that into His plan so we could break out in spontaneous show tunes as we navigate mortality.

For the past few days I've been paying attention to moments where a musical number would be appropriate.

For example, I could wake up and jump on my bed singing, "Whoa, That was Weird!" in which I recount the bizarre dream I had about a Venus fly trap* (but maybe that would be too close to Little Shop of Horrors).

Then when I drop my my kids off at a friend's house and have two glorious hours to myself, I could sing, "Mom on the Run," a number that celebrates the opportunity to go to Walmart alone. I'll be joined by a chorus of other moms - the whole thing will be very "Step in Time" except we'll be dancing on vans.

Then when Scotty and I have all our kids in the van with us, and every single one of them is trying to talk over the other, we can sing, "Will I Ever Hear the Sound of My Own Voice Again?" which is a lot like "Farmer Refuted" as we all try to sing our own lyrics over one another.

Other songs include:

"Hiding my Chick-Fil-A"

This number is for when I park in front of a random house after dark so I can eat my nuggets in peace, and then someone calls the cops on me for suspicious activity, and I sing my explanation to the police officer.

"Everybody Splash Now"

This is after my kids take a shower, and my bathroom floor is flooded, so I dance in the water (like at the end of Descendants 2).

"I Cried Over the Fries"

This is a ballad I sing about the Moochies french fries I had for lunch. They were so good, they brought a tear to my eye.

"Fast Food Hoedown"

This is a song I sing in defense of eating out twice in one day (I bust out some fantastic barrel rolls in this one).

"Bed Time At Last"

This is the big finale. I don't want to give away too much, but there's some break dancing involved.





*True story. What would Freud say about that?