15 Topics in 15 Years

Fifteen years ago today, Scotty and I said "I do."

(Actually, that's not true because our wedding ceremony didn't include that exact wording, but suffice it to say that by the end of the day, everything was tidy and legal, and we were stuck together in all of the official ways).

We hoped that we would be able to do something special for this anniversary (15 years is a good excuse to do something fun), but it just isn't in the cards (see #3 below). The good news is that we have five years to start planning something great for our twentieth (ha!)

(Now please imagine a picture of Scotty and me together posted here. Perhaps we are looking at each other, laughing candidly. A twinkle in each of our eyes. This picture does not exist outside of anyone's imagination, so try to hold it there a while...)

(Keep holding...)

(Look how happy we are!)

(Wait for it...)

(Don't you want to be us?)

(Just a little longer...)

(Okay, you may release the image).

In honor of our fifteenth anniversary, here are 15 things that Scotty and I talk about all the time:

Topic #1: What we see on Instagram

We have very, very different Instagram feeds. Scotty follows a bunch of people he doesn't know. His Instagram is full of food, travel, and sports. I only follow people I know personally (with the exception of Fallon, Jackman, Timberlake, and Underwood). At the end of the day, we have lots to talk about.

Topic #2: The shapes of our heads

When we were young and skinny, we joked about how I had a "hamburger" head and Scotty had a "hot dog" head. Sometimes I wonder if I had an exaggerated image of Scotty's long, skinny face, but then I look back at photos, and I am shocked at how truly narrow his head and face used to be.

Scotty and I stand in front of the mirror a lot and talk about our head shapes and how they have changed. I'm still a "hamburger" head, but the bun has gotten thicker. Scotty is no longer a "hot dog" head, but I still take every opportunity to call him one because I think it's funny.

Topic #3: Vacations we can't actually go on

We have a really big list of places we'd like to go but probably never will. Scotty likes to type in scenarios on Get Away Today, just for fun. I like to look at flights I'll never go on.

Topic #4: Things that bug us

This is probably something we should spend less time talking about, especially lately... because there are a lot of things bugging us.

Topic #5: Our ten-year plan

In about ten years, we will hit some pretty big milestones. Our kids will start entering adulthood which means college, missions, and weddings. We've tried to be proactive in planning for these things, but we'll see... part of me thinks the world can't possibly last another ten years, and if it does, we'll be living in an underground bunker. But it's good to have a plan just in case.

Note to self: add underground bunker to ten-year plan.

Topic #6: Things we want to do to our house

The list is long, but there's never enough time or money. Just today I asked Scotty if he would put an outlet in a particular spot in the living room. He said yes, and then I said, "Well, I can wait, like, twenty years. No rush." Because really...

Topic #7: Moving

This is actually something that I try to talk about a lot, but Scotty shuts me right down. Moving is not part of our ten-year plan, but for my own peace of mind, I have to entertain the idea every now and then and see if I'm still where I belong.

Topic #8: The calendar

We have a family meeting every Sunday night where we go over our calendar for the week. Without this conversation, we are completely lost and dysfunctional.

Topic #9: Our bed

Anytime we spend a night away from our bed, we come home and talk about how much we love our bed. Here's the truth about our bed: we sleep on a mattress that we bought for $25 from a hotel that was remodeling. It has a ten-year-old memory foam mattress topper on it that has huge chunks missing from our children and our cat (may he rest in peace).* There is no new mattress in our ten-year plan. Why ruin a good thing?

But really, after fifteen years, we are still living primarily on hand-me-downs and second-hand purchases. This is not what I envisioned my life would be like at this point, and yet, there's nothing wrong with it. Nineteen year old me would have died if she'd seen what my life is like now!

Topic #10: How lazy we want to be

We make a lot of comments to each other about how we don't want to be parents "today" or how we just want to stay in bed and watch TV. I'll have you know, though, we have never stayed in bed and watched TV all day, and we parent our children daily despite our lack of motivation. It may not be quality parenting, but it is parenting nonetheless.

Topic # 11: Vasectomies

Scotty and I talk about vasectomies ALL THE TIME.

ALL. THE. TIME.

My friends can attest to this. In fact, raise your hand if I've talked to you about vasectomies in the past six months.

See?

Topic #12: Church re-caps

Since we spend at least two hours in entirely different areas of the church each Sunday (I'm in primary and Scotty is in Young Men) we give a full report after church each week.

Topic #13: What I bought at the store

I'm also always recounting everything I buy at the store. This especially includes stuff I get a good deal on, like when ClickList is out of something, and they substitute something bigger and better to make up for it! Woot woot!

Topic #14: What the "bros" are up to

Scotty spends time with a couple of friends throughout the week. They do some side jobs, play basketball, and... who knows what else. So I get updates on the bros. Things like, "Today Mark send me a twelve minute Marco Polo of his dog staring at a hamster."

Topic #15: How fat we are

I try really hard to not use the "f" word, but can I be honest for a second? Scotty and I are blown away by how fat we are. We don't know how it happened. We just woke up like this one day!

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We've had a wonderful fifteen years together. Here's hoping we're still willing to share an underground bunker after fifteen more.

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Just for fun, here are links to my past anniversary posts:

Five

Seven

Eight

Ten

Thirteen

Fourteen

*I feel like I should clarify that my cat's death was unrelated to the claw marks he left in our memory foam.