Today while I was indulging in my current reading selection, The Distant Hours, I came across a part where the main character, Edie, is looking at a photo from her parents' wedding and thinking about how young they were in the picture and how much they didn't yet know about their lives.
This made me think about Scotty's and my wedding photos.
(This is actually one of our engagement photos - our wedding photos, back from the days of film, haven't been properly scanned).
There was a lot we didn't know.
We didn't know what we would be when we grew up. We didn't know when or where we would buy a home. We didn't know what our education would end up being. We didn't know about our future jobs or our four children. We didn't know about the hard things we would experience.
Nor the beautiful...
Nor the sacred...
We didn't know that we would be overweight or that we would someday begin to spend a ridiculous amount of time craving sushi. We didn't know that our favorite restaurant would close or that we would love our mini van so much.
We didn't know how terrible we would be at yard work or that we would keep our ten-year-old carpet for thirteen more years (that number continues to rise). We had no idea that we would develop a deep love for strategy board games or that we would be very impatient parents.
The list of things we didn't know is endless, and in some ways, it makes us look foolish, but at the same time, if I could have known it all then, it wouldn't have done me any good.
After thirteen years of being married, we still have a lot of unknown ahead of us, and I like it that way.
"And he's so impossibly young, they both are; he still has hair, right across the top of his head, and no idea that it's not going to stick around... That photo is a frozen moment; their whole future lies unknown and ahead just as it should."
-Kate Morton, The Distant Hours
It's funny, because this is the first time in my entire life that I have not wanted the future to be so unknown. I used to like it that way too, I never wanted to know (partly out of fear though) so this new feeling of wanting to know is weird for me. And also unsettling.
ReplyDeletebeautifully said!
ReplyDeleteI love this so so much! I keep one of the pictures from our wedding in the van and one on the fridge because I love looking at us before we knew any of this. We were totally committed to each other and to all the unknown days ahead, and we still are. It makes me happy thinking of all we've experienced together and that lies ahead. Also there is a song I love called "dear younger me." My favorite line in that song doesn't actually exist (i thought it said something that it doesn't actually say, but I like my version better so I still sing it that way...because I'm so rebellious). But I thought it said, "if I knew then what I know now the combination would have had no power." Isn't that beautiful? I believe it's true. The power of our experience and knowledge comes through the living of it all. Any way, thought you might like that as much as i do :)
ReplyDeleteWell, this is just the sweetest thing on the interwebs today!
ReplyDeletexox