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Tuesday, September 19, 2023

Things I Wouldn’t Change

September Writing Challenge - Prompt #12:

Rewind

Those of you who have been reading this blog for a long time might remember the days of Scotty and me attending school. We gained our educations a little “non-traditionally” in that we got married, bought a house, and started a family before we finished our degrees.

After high school, Scotty’s plan was to work for an electric company for a year, serve a mission for our church, then come home and do a trade program to become an electrician. He worked for the year and went on his mission to South Carolina. While he was gone, two major events happened: September 11 and the Salt Lake City Olympics. Both of these events affected the work, and by the time Scotty got home, the company was unable to hire him back because they were doing layoffs. Scotty took a job he thought would be temporary, and he ended up being there for 5-6 years. His boss was very anti-education and kept telling Scotty he didn’t need to go to school. Scotty felt otherwise and ended up starting school during his last year at that job (while I was pregnant with Nicky). Then the company sold and moved across the country, and Scotty was laid off. 

(Side note: guess who ended up with a masters degree a few years later? Scotty’s education hating boss!)

Scotty got a new job an hour away from home. Once again, we thought this would be temporary until he found something closer to home, but he ended up working there for about ten years. It seemed inconvenient and even kind of stupid at first, but when it was time for Scotty to transfer to a university, he was able to go to Utah Valley University right by his work. Little did we know, we were set up to be in the right place at the right time.

It took Scotty eight years to get his Bachelor’s degree. It felt slow, but we ate the elephant one bite at a time. The credits added up, and pretty soon, Scotty was donning a cap and gown.

I don’t know how we survived those eight years. We had three of our four children while Scotty was going to school. Many days, he left at 6:00 am, and he didn’t get home until after 10:00 pm. I did Halloween alone for many years because Scotty always had class. A few days a week, our kids didn’t even see him. 

In hindsight it’s all a blur. I know it happened, but I have a hard time envisioning it now.

Scotty’s graduation (he actually finished prior to this, but he didn’t “walk” until the following spring. At this point I had started school, and Eva was two weeks old). 

After I graduated high school, I went to a junior college and got an Associate’s and an accounting certificate. Scotty returned from his mission two days after I started college. While I was going to school, I worked at the local dairy. Then after I graduated, I started working at a special education school. I didn’t transfer to a university.

Right after Scotty graduated, I felt a strong impression that it was my turn to go back to school. It wasn’t what I wanted, but I couldn’t set it aside. I applied and registered for BYU-Idaho, then I found out I was pregnant with Eva. I was also the primary president and a bit nuts, I guess, because I kept up on all three for a while. I was a different person back then - I could handle a lot. I kept up on my classes, grew a fetus, scheduled an induction after finals, and started the new semester from my hospital bed. Then I got released as primary president. Phew. (You can read a more detailed version of the story here).

Now nine years ago!

It took me three years, but I completed my Bachelor’s degree. 

As you know, we are religious people, so we did all of this prayerfully. Even though it may seem like we worked backwards, we did what felt right for us. 

My mother-in-law asked us the other day if we are encouraging our kids to get their degrees right after high school and not the way we did it. While that’s what we would recommend, what we really want for our children is for them to make that decision prayerfully. We’ve been asked if we wish we had done it differently, and our answer is no. We didn’t do it “wrong.” We learned and experienced some amazing things on our journey, and I would never trade that wisdom for something more convenient or traditional. One of the greatest evidences of God’s hand in our lives has been the path we’ve followed in our employment and education. I even feel a little spoiled because we got to have it all! We got to have a house, a family, an education, and a career. In the end, we did what we felt the Spirit guided us to do, and we wouldn’t change a thing.

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