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Tuesday, June 14, 2022

Three Tales

The Ladybug's Tale


Last night Scotty went for a run. When he came home, I noticed something dark on the back of his neck. My first thought was that it was a tick since he’d just returned from camping a few days prior and had found three ticks on him while he was gone. 

Upon closer inspection, I realized it was a small ladybug. Scotty was about to get in the shower, so he took the ladybug off his neck and put it on the bathroom counter.

A day later, the ladybug is still in the bathroom. So I guess it just lives there now. 

Yes, this photo was taken from the toilet. Don't judge me!


A Tale of Big, Dumb Ideas


While Scotty was camping, I was desperate to keep my girls busy. We have an old playset in our backyard that we started to refinish several years ago and never finished. 


I decided to get out all my old paint from the garage and shed and let the girls paint it however they wanted. I knew it wouldn't be pretty, but I imagined them painting rainbows, flowers, and sunsets and having a joyous time.

Instead, I got this.



I have regrets.


The Tell Tale Tooth 

Throughout our marriage, Scotty and I have always thrown our change into an old pot and cashed it in every few years or so to use toward a vacation. It's usually enough to sponsor a few gas station snacks on a road trip. We call it our "pot money."

Today, Nicky and I went to the bank and cashed in our coins for an upcoming trip. The bank teller has to take the coins and dump them in a machine to count them. Then we can cash out in bills or deposit the balance in our account. Every time we do this, the teller brings back a few random items from our pot - usually car wash tokens, Canadian currency, and a stray thumb tack or golf tee. 

Today, the teller returned with our receipt for $102.95. Then he said, "Here's your screw, your key ring, and your tooth."

Then he handed me the inventory, and sure enough, there was a tooth. And a weird looking tooth, at that. 

 
In shock, I stuttered, "I have no idea why there was a tooth in there!" but every word felt like a cover story for some sick tooth fetish or something. There is a walk of shame I didn't previously know, and that is when your bank teller finds a tooth in your money and places it in your hand, and you have to leave the facility. 

I really didn't know where the tooth came from, but when Scotty got home, the mystery unraveled... kind of. When I showed Scotty the tooth, he said, "Oh! It's my grandpa's!" You see... Scotty inherited some of his grandpa's teeth. I don't know why his grandpa's teeth aren't in his grandpa's mouth. But apparently Grandpa had some gold crowns, and he kept his teeth to sell someday, and those teeth now belong to my husband. As you can see from the photo, the crown is missing from the tooth. Scotty sold it for a few bucks, and somehow the rest of the tooth ended up in our pot. 

How? Why? That is the remaining mystery as well as how and why the teeth were removed from Grandpa's body in the first place. 

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