What You're Getting

Perhaps, like me, you’ve perused social media and seen this about a million times:

Every time I see this prompt, I think about how lucky the person who steals everything on top of my fridge will be.

Seriously. 

You see, I use the top of my fridge as the catch all for things I take away or try to hide from my kids. It’s the probationary place where things await their ultimate demise. Say my kid comes home from a birthday party with ten pounds of piñata candy (allow me to interject once more that I think my kids participate in an abnormal amount of piñata destruction. How many piñatas should the average kid be exposed to in a year’s time? Really. I need to know). At some point, that piñata candy goes up on the fridge to be forgotten about so I can eventually get rid of it. 

So what is this hypothetical fridge thief getting? A hecka lotta piñata candy. But that’s not all... Halloween candy, Christmas candy, Easter candy. ALL THE CANDIES!!!

But also...

Bubbles.

Lightbulbs.

Fireworks.

Gum.

Lighters.

Kinetic sand.

Sharpies.

Packaging tape.

Things that make noise (whistles, harmonicas, and clacker toys).

Slime.

And just to keep things interesting - protective phone screen covers, a spray bottle/fan, a ukulele, and two cabinet doors that we never put back on after we re-did our kitchen, plus a bag full of hardware. 

Quite the haul, I dare say. So bring a big bag, Fridge Thief. 

Now, based on that list, you may be thinking I have the most cluttered fridge top of all time, but look:

It's actually not that bad. 

Everything is in these two bins - hidden out of sight. Yes, even the doors to the kitchen cabinets! If you do steal what's on top of my fridge, please leave the bins. I'll need to restock them after you leave.