"Summer" Break is in Full Swing (and ten other random facts)

Fact #1: We've been getting an unusual amount of rain around here for the past few weeks. I don't necessarily mind it unless I'm stuck downtown with four kids in a downpour, and I'm three blocks from my van hiding out under an awning outside a cafe, and we are all wearing flip-flops.

(Flip-flops + rain = imminent death).

Fact #2: My kids celebrated the last day of school by splashing in the gutter.

Fact #3: Zoe has been going through a "wear pajamas all the time" phase for about three years now. I make her wear real clothes to school, but she usually changes straight into pajamas as soon as she gets home. Sometimes we have to let her wear a a nightgown under her dress for church just to keep the peace. 

Fact #4: Today I'm patting myself on the back because I paid off my library fines. I kind of had to, or they would've sent me to collections. 

$28.99

Small successes, folks. 

Fact #5: As hard as summer break is with the kids, there are a lot of benefits to having Nicky around. He is a great helper, and he is so much like his dad. Today I was supervising him using some power tools (while trying to remain calm), and it's amazing to watch him because he just knows stuff! I asked him once, "Did Dad show you how to do that?" and he said, "No. I just know." And there I was searching for YouTube videos for no reason. 

Fact #6: The kid can't play a ukulele to save his life, though. Just saying. I spend an hour last week trying to get him to hold the darn thing without looking like he's scared of catching a disease from it. He never got there. 

Fact #7: But how lucky am I? Scotty is amazing. I really mean it. And Nicky is a Mini Scotty. So I have these two incredible men in my life. 

Fact #8: I currently have a sinus infection, a stye in my eye, and a possible broken toe. And just for good measure, I stabbed my hand with a skewer so I'm punctured, too. 

Fact #9: Even though it's still May, my personal May chaos has come to an end. Hallelujah! I'm very grateful that my aforementioned ailments (see fact #8) didn't hit until after the madness. 

Fact #10: Scotty and I have slowly been making small improvements around our house, such as swapping out our builder-grade faucets and installing soffit lighting. It's all very exciting! 

Sitting

I'm currently sitting in my driveway. I hang out here a lot in the summer while my kids ride bikes.

Here's how it goes:

1. Kids want to ride bikes
2. I open garage and get bikes off hooks (they hang on the wall)
3. Kids ride bikes for 7 minutes
4. Driveway ends up covered in bikes and helmets, kids disappear

We are right on track today. The kids just got into the Otter Pops and are out of sight. I know they are eating them in the living room in front of the TV, which is against the rules, but do I want to get out of my camp chair and go inside to enforce rules? Heavens no.

Speaking of Otter Pops, I am suffering an Otter Pop injury. Ever had the sharp edge of the pouch slice your inner cheek? Otter Pops are dangerous!

Also, my kids leave Otter Pop wrappers everywhere. I've banned Otter Pops from the house, but people keep giving them to us. Why y'all got to be so giving with the Otter Pops?

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I'm currently sitting in my La-Z-Boy in the living room. It's old and threadbare, There's a hole in the arm rest, and I imagine that there are all sorts of mysterious treasures shoved in there. Boogers and garbage, mostly. But ignorance is bliss, so I'm never going to look.

I cleaned the living room and kitchen today, and it took a really long time to get the floors done. The floor will always be my greatest nemesis. Sometimes I think I should get a robot vacuum, but I don't think a Roomba could handle the task at hand. What I really need is part-time custody of a large dog. Then again, that only solves the food part of the problem. I'm not sure what to do about the broken crayons, the Legos, and the Otter Pop wrappers. My part-time dog probably shouldn't eat those.

Sitting in my recliner is the reward I'm giving myself for a job well done, yet, as I've "rested," my kids have managed to destroy the room with blankets and stuffed animals. My reward comes at a cost.

When is Roomba going to invent a dumpster-sized robot vacuum that can suck up garbage, toys, and disobedient children?

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I'm currently sitting on my bed. I can hear my kids fighting downstairs. I really just want to know the truth: do my kids fight more, less, or the same amount as children in other families?

Another mom once told me that her kids never fight. I can't even process this.

The good thing is that my kids have the capacity to reach both ends of the spectrum. When they get along, they are really amazing. Like, it's some level 10 sibling love. And when they don't get along, it's some level 10 fighting. So I guess we need to know level 10 fighting to know level 10 love.

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I'm currently sitting in my father-in-law's chair. I don't usually get to occupy this seat, but he's not here, so I called dibs! He must've eaten something cheesy recently - based on the piece of shredded cheese I found on the armrest. 

On most Sundays, we go to my in-laws' house to visit. Sometimes we go there even if they're not home - which is the case today. On Sundays we like a change of scenery. Plus their back yard is magical, so we like setting our kids free here. 

I realized recently that I've been going to my in-laws' house on Sundays for over twenty years! More than half my life! 

I didn't know that time would go so fast. 

I still feel young, and yet, I don't get ID-ed when I buy cigarettes at the gas station each week.* I look at the sign that says, "We ID anyone who looks younger than 30," and I mourn that I apparently look my age. 

Thirty-five.

Then I look over at the kid next to me - also buying smokes - and I see that his ID says he was born in 1998, and I think, "WHAT?!? Kids born in 1998 are buying cigarettes?!?"

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*I don't smoke, but a friend of mine does, and she sometimes asks me to grab a pack for her. She wants to quit, so at some point, I'm going to have to say, "I'm sorry, but I can't buy them for you anymore. It's time!" but not yet. 

Summer begins in 5...4...3...

It's the the last day of school, and I'm ready, but I'm not ready.

I'm ready for lazy mornings and not having to drive ten thousand places every day. I'm ready for a break from dance lessons and after school programs. I'm ready to put the coats and snow pants away and to not worry about sickness at every turn. I'm ready to let my kids play in the hose and consider it good enough for a bath. I'm ready for BBQs and fresh summer produce and days at the park. I'm ready for mid-day naps under the swamp cooler.

But I'm not ready for:

"I'm hungry."

"Can a friend come over?"

"What are we going to do today?"

"We aren't supposed to have chores in summer!"

"You're the worst!"

"Can we do water balloons?"

"It's too hot!"

"This is so unfair!"

"Can I have another popsicle?"

"It wasn't me!"

"Moooooooommmmmm!"

And I'm not ready for bikes laying all over the place, the never-ending tracking of sand and water in the house, or battles over too much TV. I'm not ready to be constantly soaked in my own sweat and suffering the urge to claw my face off if I have the smallest bit of make-up on. I'm not ready for Scotty to be gone nearly every-other week, and I'm not ready for ugly, knee-length shorts. I'm not ready to take four kids and twelve bottles of sunscreen everywhere I go. And I'm most certainly not ready to do anything involving a swimming suit.

So bring it on, summer. Except don't.

(More like Day 3 for me)

Parenting Is...

...trying to convince your kids to eat all the Lucky Charms and not just the marshmallows

...asking "whodunnit" all day everyday and knowing that you're never going to get the answer

...finding stickers all over the furniture and knowing that you didn't give them to your kid, so where are the the dang things coming from?

...reaching under the seat of your car to blindly locate a missing shoe and bringing your hand out covered in peanut butter

...having a child jump on you at church, which forces your gum to fly out of your mouth and into your hair

...and then having to gnaw off an inch-long chunk of your hair with your teeth to get the gum out before you lead the music in primary

...finding surprises in the toilet multiple times a day

...finding surprises on the toilet multiple times a day

...having to make stupid rules like, "No acting like a gorilla!"

...and having to follow up with stupid consequences like, "Anyone who acts like a gorilla will have to write I will not act like a gorilla 100 times

...being asked "Can I make slime?" everyday

...worrying about morals, safety, developmental milestones, manners, health, and work ethic all while beating yourself up because you forgot to put sunscreen on

...having to decide when to smell-check and when to just assume it's dirty

...making eye contact with a dude in IHOP while you're on the toilet because your kid ran out of your stall and through the bathroom door, and that guy's table is right outside

...always being the bearer of bad news. You can't have candy for breakfast! Mermaids aren't real! Yes, you have to have a shot today! You're too tall for the play place because you have been genetically engineered to be six-feet tall by age five! Potato chips are not vegetables! No, you cannot make slime!

Here I Sit

Here I sit on the last Tuesday of the school year. I just got home from Eva's preschool "carnival." Unfortunately, "carnival" means "shoving over 50 parents and 40 students in a small, hot room together for an hour and sending them home with an Otter Pop."

The weather has been rainy and chilly for the past week, so all the end-of-school activities that are normally held outside have been moved inside. At the beginning of last week, it was in the mid to upper 80's for several days. Since our swamp cooler isn't hooked up yet, our house was 82 degrees for four days straight. Gotta love spring in Utah!

The butter when my house was 82 degrees

Scotty just got back from Paraguay. He was gone for nine days, and you know what? I handled it. At the end of each day, I patted myself on the back because everyone was alive, and the house was still standing, and it was MAY! The weird thing is, after Scotty travels, I tend to get a little depressed. I don't really understand it. I'm fine while he's gone - I mean, I'm kinda nutso, but I'm not depressed. Then when he gets home, it's like a wave comes crashing at me from behind. BAM! And I just want to lay in bed for three weeks.

While Scotty was gone, I drank soda. Nearly six months of sobriety out the window! I had two Ruby Red Squirts (amazing!) and three Cokes (amazing!) You guys! I love soda! I LOVE IT!!! And I want to have one occasionally, but I don't know how to moderate it. Once I taste that sweet nectar, it's all I want and all I think about. I had my week-long love affair, and now I have to stop, or I'll spiral out of control. Scotty always says, "Why don't you just drink it on the weekends?" I wish I could. But unless someone is with me at all times to slap it out of my hand on weekdays, there is no way to enforce that rule.

My first Coke in 2019 - It was beautiful

I'm kind of bugged, though, because quitting soda doesn't seem to have made any impact on my life or my body. I was drinking a minimum of 32 ounces of Dr. Pepper everyday, and very often, I drank more. After five and a half months without a single ounce of ANY soda, I weigh the same, and my blood pressure and cholesterol levels are the same. Where is my reward? What am I making this sacrifice for? I want my juice or I want a pay off!!!

Since it's May (and you know by now that May is cray), I had a lot of stuff to handle on my own while Scotty was gone. Two talent shows, three field trips, church, Mother's Day, and a jump rope performance, to name a few.

Nicky told me several months ago that he wanted to dress like a chicken and "bock" "Don't Stop Believin" in the 6th grade talent show. He stuck with this dream, but he changed songs because he was afraid he would forget the words (not sure how this matters when you're "bocking," but whatever). He decided to do "Baby Shark," but the day before the talent show, we couldn't find his chicken suit, and I feared I'd accidentally sent our stash of adult-sized onesies to the DI during my Marie Kondo episode (I bagged them all up and put them in the basement to store. We have more than the average amount of adult-sized onesies. Chickens? Check! Unicorns? Check. Christmas-themed pajamas? Check. I couldn't find the bag and thought I must've taken it to the DI with other bags by mistake). Nicky was so upset with me, and I ended up ordering a chicken onesie from Amazon with very expensive shipping to get it to us on time. Then, by some miracle, Nicky found the onesies in a bin in the basement - one that was labeled something completely unrelated to adult-sized onesies (oops!) I was able to cancel the Amazon order (thank heavens), and Nicky went on to perform a lovely chicken version of "Baby Shark" for his peers.

Over the weekend, Nicky's teacher texted me and asked if he'd be willing to do his chicken performance in front of the whole school on Monday... and he did!

(I know, I know. My child is gifted. I try to stay humble about it).

Three years ago, Nicky was so shy, he couldn't even walk into the school office by himself to call me if he was sick. Now he dresses like a chicken and "bocks" in front of the whole school with no fear.

I'm trying to be okay with the fact that that is Nicky's last week of elementary school. On Thursday at 1:00, he'll walk out of the school for the last time, and I might be a mess. The school has a tradition of "clapping in" the kindergartners on their very first day. The whole school lines the lobby and hallways and applauds while the kindergartners come in. Then on the last day of 6th grade, they have a "clap out" where everyone applauds the 6th graders as they walk out of the school.

I can't even.

This year I had a kindergartner and a 6th grader, so Zoe was "clapped in" and Nicky will be "clapped out." Tomorrow is the last day of kindergarten, and I'm so sad. I want Zoe to be in kindergarten forever, and I would mind if Nicky stayed in 6th grade forever. This has been such a great school year for all of my kids (except Eva because she's a pain in the tush... I had to shove her through the preschool door crying pretty much every day). All of my kids (even the one that's a pain in the tush) had fantastic teachers who have all earned their place in heaven, as far as I'm concerned. Nicky had an especially wonderful year, and I'm so grateful! 

After Thursday, it will still be May, but it will no longer be cray. I'm not sure what we'll do about that. 

Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend

Occasionally I like to look for writing prompts on the internet. Most of them really aren't my style, but sometimes I find a prompt or questionnaire that I like. This one made me laugh because it's titled, "Questions to ask your boyfriend."

Since I'm fresh outta boyfriends, I guess I'll answer the questions myself.

1. What movie was so sad you will never watch it again?

I think this is a really good question, but I can't think of one. There are plenty of movies I won't watch again but not because they are sad.

2. What are the two biggest lessons you've learned from previous relationships?

Since I haven't had a lot of romantic relationships in my life, I'm going to answer this from a friendship perspective.

Lesson 1: The best friendships are built on the true version of yourself.

Lesson 2: Competition can't be a thing.

Just don't ask me how often I still fail at these lessons.

3. What would be the absolute perfect day?

I'm not going to answer this question because I kind of hate it, but I want to point out that this question pops up in, like, every questionnaire in the history of ever.

4. What did you learn a little too late?

I feel like my life's lessons have come at the right time, but I wish I'd had better social skills as a teenager and young adult.

5. What gross and unhygienic things do people do that bother you?

I'm not a huge germaphobe, so I can tolerate a lot. I'm not saying I like gross and unhygienic things, but I'm not super sensitive about it. The one thing that really annoys me, though, is when women don't properly care for and dispose of their menstrual products in restrooms. Ladies! C'mon!

6. What habit do you have that you don't think many other people have?

I make a clicking sound in the back of my throat when I'm tired, and I always space my steps evenly between cracks in the sidewalk. I also like to shoot rose petals out of my nostrils. Don't knock it til you've tried it!

7. What are you too hard on yourself for?

I don't want you to know!

(Funny how I'm secure enough to admit that I like shooting rose petals out of my nose, but I can't tell you what I'm hard on myself for).

8. What habits do you have that annoy other people?

Oh boy. This is something I just have to guess on. I tend to be a bit of a control freak, and that might annoy some people. Also, I clear my throat a lot, and that's probably irritating to listen to. I sometimes meddle where I shouldn't, and I probably give people unwanted advice and act like a know-it-all.

9. What do most people overestimate or underestimate about you?

For some reason, people always assume I'm good at doing hair, and I'm really not. My whole life, people have asked me to french braid their hair - like there's something about me that says, "This girl can braid!" It never goes well. I'm really bad at doing hair.

I don't know if anyone really underestimates me. I'm surrounded by people who believe in me. Whaddayaknow!

10. How often do you feel utterly worn down?

Umm....

This might be May speaking, but as far as I can tell... all the dang time.

11. What is something that you should do but will never do?

Iron.

12. What was the best thing about how your parents raised you?

My mom never really helicoptered. She let me make a lot of my own decisions, which is something that worked really well for my personality. My dad was good about making me earn money and spend it wisely.

13. What do you most look forward to about getting old?

Having no house payment.

At least, that's the goal. We have a plan, and we are on track with that plan, but we are also open to direction from the Lord.

14. What is the biggest sign of weakness in a person?

Not being able to admit when they're wrong. As a person who does not like to be wrong, I know this to be true. But also, not being able to forgive.

15. What's something you tried really hard to like but just couldn't?

This Is Us.

I can't with Mandy Moore. I just can't!

16. What makes you different from most people?

You mean besides the fact that I like shooting rose petals out of my nose, and I don't like This Is Us?

17. What was the best mistake you ever made? 

I thought and thought about this, and I honestly can't think of a time I've made a mistake and things turned out better for it.

18. If money was no object, where would you live?

I would buy several houses in an old run-down neighborhood and make many of my family and friends move there with me (which they will agree to... because FREE HOUSES). We would fix up the houses and help build up an existing community.

19. Who was the most toxic person you've ever known?

I don't know if I can really bestow that honor on someone, but a former co-worker comes to mind.

20. What were the last two books that you read?

Even This and Celebrating a Christ-Centered Easter both of which happen to be by Emily Belle Freeman, and I read them at the beginning of April, so dang, it's been a while since I finished a book.

21. If you dropped everything and went on a road trip, where would you go?

I'd love to head across the nation and hit several places along the way. I love road trips, so I'm really good with anywhere! I'd love to see the Redwoods and the Oregon coast. I also really want to go to Nauvoo. And Mount Rushmore. I could go to Idaho to see Shannon and Cyndi or to Memphis to see the temple Scotty helped renovate. I love South Carolina, and Disneyworld has been calling my name for quite some time!

22. What makes you nervous?

Calling people on the phone. It's so stupid, but I know a lot of you can relate. I'm always worried that I'm bothering people or that I'll have to face some form of rejection. But mostly I worry that we won't be able to hear/understand each other.

23. What makes you angrier than it should?

People letting me go ahead of them when they have the right of way in traffic. You were there first! Just go! You disrupt the flow when you start flagging people to go ahead of you. I may be the most impatient person on the planet, but I can wait three seconds at a four-way stop for my turn. Keep a movin!

24. What are the manliest and least manly things you have ever done?

I guess this is where the boyfriend things becomes relevant. But never fear! I will answer this question! When I was a kid, I tried to master the art of peeing while standing. It was both the manliest and the least manly thing I've ever done.

25. How do you feel about pets and animals?

Pretty much the same way I feel about kids. They are wonderful when they are clean and well-behaved.

The Patriarch's Granddaughter

A few weeks ago I had the opportunity to meet a blogging friend, Erika, in person. We became acquainted over twelve years ago as part of the same blogging community. Erika emailed me a few months ago and told me she was coming to Salt Lake for an archery tournament, so I sent her a list of ideas for things to do while she was here, and I made my way downtown so I could spend some time with her.

One of our main topics of discussion was religion. Erika is Methodist, and I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. We had some great conversations about our experiences with God's love and our faith. Erika asked wonderful and genuine questions about my church, and I felt a lot of enthusiasm about answering them. One thing she asked about was patriarchal blessings. I was really excited about that because patriarchal blessings have been a big part of my life!

In my Church, members have the opportunity to be given a one-time blessing by a patriarch - someone who is ordained specifically to give these blessings. The purpose of the blessing is to offer the individual guidance from Heavenly Father and to declare the persons' lineage in the House of Israel (read more here). The blessing can give counsel, promises, and warnings and help us understand our spiritual gifts.

We do not openly share or discuss the specifics of our patriarchal blessings, but I can tell you that mine has been very helpful throughout my life. The older I get, the more sense it makes, as I have seen portions of it fulfilled. Some couples choose to share theirs with each other. Scotty and I have read each other's, but we'd been married for several years before we did that. This is just based on personal choice.

The reason I say that patriarchal blessings have been a big part of my life is because my grandpa was a patriarch. This is an office in the Church that not many people hold. Patriarchs maintain that office through life unless it is lost through transgression. They may, for health reasons, stop actively giving blessings, but they remain patriarchs, as was the case with my grandpa (read more here).

Since my grandpa was a patriarch, my grandma was given the responsibility to type the blessings. Each individual is given a copy of his or her blessing so they can read it any time. The blessings are also maintained by the Church so if a person loses their copy, they can request one.

The blessings are not written down beforehand. The patriarch may jot down some notes, but the blessing is essentially dictated by the Spirit. It's quite phenomenal!

My grandpa would always have two tape recorders going when he gave blessings (the second one was for back-up in case there were any problems with the first one). My grandma would then listen to the tapes and type the blessings on her type writer (computers were eventually an option, but my grandma was mostly a typewriter gal).

 

I spent countless hours playing in my grandma's house while she sat in the office typing away to my grandpa's voice. I was always there since I lived right across the street. The recordings of my grandpa giving blessings were just part of the everyday background noise in my grandparent's house along with the clickety clack of the typewriter. Because of this, I grew up hearing hundreds of patriarchal blessings.

Another thing my grandma did was schedule the blessings. She always put the information for the individuals on post-its and hung them on the door frame next to the phone. Since my grandparents lived in our community, my grandpa gave blessings to a lot of my friends and school mates. I always loved checking the names on the door frame because there was usually a name of someone I knew.

Whenever my grandpa was giving blessings, my grandma would take the phone off the hook. We always knew that it was blessing time when we got the busy signal. Sometimes I'd sit in the window and watch across the street, waiting for the people to leave. Then I'd try calling to see if I got the busy signal. If I did, that meant another person was coming for a blessing, and I couldn't come over yet.

Even though my grandpa lived across the street, he wasn't in our stake, and therefore, wasn't our patriarch. With special permission, I was able to receive my blessing from my him when I was 17.

Not only was my grandpa a patriarch, my great-grandpa was as well. Patriarchs aren't common, but father & son patriarchs are even less so!

And all of that is why I nearly jumped for joy when I got to tell Erika about patriarchal blessings.

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For a fun read, check out this blog post where I gave a tour of my grandparents' house.

Our Anniversary Tradition

Last week, Scotty and I celebrated our 16th anniversary. By "celebrated" I mean we remembered it was our anniversary after Scotty had left for work, and we texted each other, "Oh yeah, happy anniversary!" I had to work at the school that morning and then our girls had their dance concert that night, and there wasn't a minute to spare.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again:

MAY IS CRAY!

Young people everywhere, I urge you to not get married in May! It's too late for me, but you can save yourselves! And your mothers! For heaven's sake... think of your mothers!!! My children will not be granted any wedding funds if they choose to get married in May. 

Or December.

(Oh my gosh, I'm going to be an awful mother-in-law!)

 

Even though Scotty and I didn't get to do anything alone together for our anniversary (but we will... eventually... when it's no longer May... and when we are in the same country) we have a tradition that we were able to squeeze in between dance concerts, church responsibilities, and school functions. 

Since our wedding anniversary marks the day we became a family, we like to do something to celebrate with our kids. Every year (usually on the Monday of our anniversary week, but this time we had to go for Wednesday because our kids got in trouble on Monday for fighting, so their consequence was postponing) we have what we call our "Familyversary Dinner." 

We draw for food assignments (entree, side dish, dessert, drink, etc) and then we go shopping together. Each person picks out whatever they want for their food assignment, and then we come home and prepare the food and eat dinner together. Usually I try to make it "fancy" with a table cloth and candles, but we've had a few close calls with the candles, so we've stopped using them for now. I also used to use wine glasses, but every year someone spills, so I decided they don't spark joy and got rid of them. This year we resorted to paper plates, and we had an extra kid at our house. Whatever. We got it done. 

 

When we started this tradition, we did $5 for each person to get whatever they wanted for dinner, but we usually ended up with a lot of ice cream and cookies or a meal where everything was orangs and covered in cheese. So for the past three years we've done assignments instead to provide a little balance. We still end up eating a lot of junk food, but sometimes there's a nutrient in there. We kind of have to stick with things that are easy to fix since we don't want to come home and spend hours fixing food from scratch. So sometimes the kids end up picking something like Lunchables or mac & cheese. It's all good. We have a lot of fun with it!

This year's menu included:

Daisy (entree): chicken nuggets

Me (entree): Totinos pizza

Nicky (drink): Capri Suns

Eva (side dish): Club crackers and cheese

Zoe (side dish): strawberries

Scotty (dessert): pumpkin chocolate chip cookies

 Here's to 16 years as a family! With many more to come!

Of Mothers and More

Once upon a time, I didn't know if I would ever be a mom. You can read more about that here.

 

Scotty and Britt, pre-kids

(believe it or not, we are actually adults in this photo)

My time of infertility was short-lived, but I had a couple of rough Mother's Days. Attending church was pretty hard in general. One thing that got me through my Sundays was a cute, little baby in my ward named Toby. Every week in church he would greet me with a big smile, sometimes even a giggle, and it always melted my heart. It was like he knew I needed it. On one of those Mother's Days, I remember watching Toby in the pew in front of me, and even though I didn't know what my future would be, I felt peaceful. There's a journal in a box somewhere where I wrote about this day. I tried to find it for this post but had no luck.

Tobes still greets me almost every Sunday, but the faces he pulls at me are a little different now:

We are very photogenic, Tobes and me.

In fact, everything is a little different now.

I've gone from whining that I couldn't have kids to whining that I do have kids. None of them got here easily or quickly, but somehow four of them showed up.

When Zoe "showed up"

As this year's Mother's Day approached, I thought about the amazing women in my life and the different experiences that each of them have had. Some have had children easily and are thriving in motherhood. Some have met motherhood with great trials including pre-natal loss, mental illness, developmental concerns, or infertility. Some have borne children at a great cost, financially and/or physically. Some have had a late start. Some have had surprise multiples. Some haven't had children of their own - some by choice and some not. Some have been handed teenagers who are not their own and told "raise them." Some have lost their own mothers.

Daisy's baby toes

Though each of us walks a different path in motherhood, we have one thing in common: we are women and we have influence.

There's a rhetoric that we are all mothers, even when we're not literally mothers. I don't remember how I felt about that when I couldn't have children, but I imagine that it's not the greatest line to feed a woman who would give anything to have a baby. It's said with good intent, though, and I understand the sentiment of it. As women, we all have influence, and being a positive influence in a child's life - whether in literal motherhood or in teaching or just simply caring - is powerful and important. I know this because I'm a mother who only gets by because of the love and support of other women.

So today, as I navigate this slightly uncomfortable holiday, I am thankful for my mothers - my mom, my step-mom, Scotty's mom, and Scotty's step-mom. I am thankful for my own motherhood journey, hard as it may be. I am thankful for my mom friends - women I laugh and cry with. And  I am thankful for those who may not consider themselves "mothers" but who uplift and support other women.

Happy Mother's Day!

The Latest in Birthday Posters

For the past six years I've made a monthly birthday poster for my kids' school. My favorite day of the school year is the day I hang the last poster! That happened last week. I always start of the year going strong, and then by May, I never want to see a roll of butcher paper again (but then I agree to continue doing it the next year. It's a vicious cycle!)

I posted the first half of the year's posters here. These are the rest for this school year:

January

In January, our family went to Disneyland, so naturally, I had Disney on the brain. Stars are one of my favorite shapes to use for the kids' names. 

February

In February, The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part came to theaters, so I made Emmett. Let it be known, Lego hands are complicated. 

March

In March I saw a Baby Shark birthday invitation, and I realized how simple the sharks would be to make out of paper, so Baby Shark, it was! But what looks "simple" never really is. These posters all take at least four hours. Some take longer. 

I draw most things free-hand on white paper, and when it looks right, I hang it on my window and trace it on to colored paper. I have to make all the pieces out of the right colors and then glue them together. I'm always on the look-out for images that would be easy(ish) to make with layered colored paper. 

April

This was the first time I did anything with an Easter theme. I haven't wanted to do Easter posters in March (it feels too early) or when Easter is early in April (because then it feels out-dated for the rest of the month). Since Easter was toward the end of April, I did an Easter poster. 

Also, this school year I started using paint sometimes. I painted the Easter basket in this one and then used a Sharpie to make the details. I also used paint to make Charlie Brown and Frosty the Snowman. 

May

For May I wanted to do something for Endgame. I had big ideas, but I went with this one since I love Captain America, and it was "simple." I figure I can use some more of my Avengers ideas next year when I'm in a rut. 

Mayday, It's May

May is the month I lose my marbles.

The other day, as I approached an elevator at the orthodontist's office, I reached into my purse, pulled out my key fob, pointed it at the elevator door, and hit the unlock button. 

Guess what! The elevator didn't open! And I thought, "Crap! Now is a really inconvenient time for my battery to die. I really need to get downstairs." The fact that my brain took the time to consider that the problem was a dead battery before it realized that key fobs do not open elevator doors is evidence that I've completely lost it. 

May is such a crazy month. There is so much to do from dance concerts to school events to daily chores. Here are some of the side effects of the end of the school year:

• I taught Junior Achievement for the kindergartners, and I lost my manual the week before the last lesson. I showed up at the school and just made stuff up. I filled the time by letting the kids take turns showing me their owies. Did you know every kindergartner on the face of this earth has a scabby elbow? True story. 

• Zoe hasn't taken her backpack to school in almost a month. 

• I took my kids through the McDonald's drive thru for breakfast THREE TIMES last week because I couldn't manage to fix them breakfast. Then yesterday, I did it again because we didn't have any food other than cereal, and all the bowls - including the random Pyrex dishes - were dirty. 

• I had to move my McDonald's cups to make room for my new McDonald's cups (it's really embarrassing when you go through the McDonald's drive thru, and you still have McDonald's garbage in your vehicle)

• Everyday my daughter asks me to sew the head back on a stupid teddy bear that she got for Christmas. Might I add that the head fell off on Christmas? It's from the dollar store. Can't we just let it rest in peace?

• Eva wears two different shoes everyday. I don't even put forth the effort to make sure they are on the correct feet. Two lefties? Whatever. A cowboy boot and a Paw Patrol sneaker? Don't care. 

• I've stopped trying to abide by our budget. Whatever it is, stick it in the cart! I'll put it on a credit card and figure out if we're broke later. 

• Daisy wants to be in the 3rd grade talent show with her friend whose mom doesn't speak a lot of English. We can't understand each other. So the friend might be coming to our house tomorrow until 7:00 or she's coming to our house at 7:00. Or maybe none of the above. I don't even know. But Daisy has been planning this since August. I need it to end!

• The car battery died on me the other day. 

• My whole body aches like I ran a half marathon (believe it or not, I actually know what that feels like), and I have a pain in my lower abdomen that I'm hoping just goes away because I don't want to deal with it. 

• My van smells like pee and sausage mcmuffins. 

• So does my bathroom.

• And my couch.

• I don't plan on seeing my kitchen table or counters until June at the earliest. 

• The other day I found Nutter Butters in my bed, and I was too lazy to get up and throw them away, so I ate them. Someone had already licked the peanut butter filling out. 

• One of our chickens died today.

• The day before Easter, we went on a family picnic. Everything we took with us is still in my trunk.

• I destroyed an umbrella a few weeks ago because I fell on top of it while it was open. 

• The thought of doing my church calling makes me want to throw up.

• I vacuumed up pennies yesterday just to get them out of my life. Now my vacuum makes funny sounds. 

• I also tried vacuuming a pile of grass in my girls' room (everyone's kid has a pile of grass and dead ladybugs in their room, right?) and clogged the hose. I can't find anything long enough to stick in there and push the grass through. I'm currently waiting for the grass to die - hoping it will take up less space when it's dried out and therefore, dislodge itself.

• I have a library book sitting on my counter that's three weeks overdue. I see it everyday, but I can't for the life of me take it back to the library.

And there you have it! A small glimpse of the mess that I am. 

How many days left in this month?

Never mind. Don't answer.