For the first half of the year, it felt like everything was in turmoil. I've never decided if I'm a fan of change. Sometimes change is refreshing, and sometimes it's terrifying. I experienced both this year.
There were big changes - like Scotty getting a new job.
And there were small changes - like swapping out all of my old, bulky mis-matched dishes for white Corelle (one of the best changes I've ever made!)
The changes weren't extremely heavy, but there were so many of them all at once that the combined weight was pretty intense. Here are some of the other changes we experienced early this year:
-We got a new van
-Scotty sold his car and started driving a work truck
-We rearranged our house so we could build bedrooms for the kids (we've lived "under construction" all year)
-We got new Church callings
-We got rid of most of our baby stuff
-We got all new insurance plans
-I switched cell phone providers and got a smart phone for the first time
-I switched cell phone providers and got a smart phone for the first time
-We refinanced our house to pay it off 10 years sooner
-We changed banks
-Two of our friends moved (one out of our city and one out of state)
-We got a new stake presidency and a new bishopric
Even though the changes were small, save for the job, it felt like our world uprooted and settled in a different direction. We had shifts in our living space, we had to make adaptions to our routines, and we had significant changes in our overall flow.
In the second half of the year, the dust began to settle, and that's when I started to experience growth. In June I went on anti-depressants, and they made a huge difference in my life. I apologize for continuing to talk about depression and medication routinely, but I am still amazed at the ways my emotional and mental state has improved. It was an unexpected and unbelievable blessing for me. As a result of feeling better, I think I have grown more spiritually in the past six months that I have in the past three years. And, like I've said before, I didn't know I was struggling so much until I started feeling better. It's only in hindsight that I can see it. In the thick of it, I had no idea how poorly I was doing.
One of my resolutions for this year was to cultivate the talents in my patriarchal blessing. I really thrived in this goal. I found that, in focusing on those talents and gifts, I was able to learn a lot about myself and my strengths. I feel really good about myself right now - not in a boastful way, but in such a way that allows me to acknowledge my own worth but continue to progress. I am less worried about the things I'm not good at and more mindful of how I can contribute.
At the end of 2016, I am content. There is work to be done and progress to be made, but I'm pleased with what has happened this year in the way of change and growth.
(I'll forewarn you that I have more New Year's themed posts formulating in my mind. I can't help it! i love the new year!)
Even though the changes were small, save for the job, it felt like our world uprooted and settled in a different direction. We had shifts in our living space, we had to make adaptions to our routines, and we had significant changes in our overall flow.
In the second half of the year, the dust began to settle, and that's when I started to experience growth. In June I went on anti-depressants, and they made a huge difference in my life. I apologize for continuing to talk about depression and medication routinely, but I am still amazed at the ways my emotional and mental state has improved. It was an unexpected and unbelievable blessing for me. As a result of feeling better, I think I have grown more spiritually in the past six months that I have in the past three years. And, like I've said before, I didn't know I was struggling so much until I started feeling better. It's only in hindsight that I can see it. In the thick of it, I had no idea how poorly I was doing.
One of my resolutions for this year was to cultivate the talents in my patriarchal blessing. I really thrived in this goal. I found that, in focusing on those talents and gifts, I was able to learn a lot about myself and my strengths. I feel really good about myself right now - not in a boastful way, but in such a way that allows me to acknowledge my own worth but continue to progress. I am less worried about the things I'm not good at and more mindful of how I can contribute.
At the end of 2016, I am content. There is work to be done and progress to be made, but I'm pleased with what has happened this year in the way of change and growth.
(I'll forewarn you that I have more New Year's themed posts formulating in my mind. I can't help it! i love the new year!)
As you know I have experience change myself. I hope 6 months from now I can have as clear of a path as you have found. Thanks for your inspiration and friendship even while you were struggling.
ReplyDeleteOoooh, this is so interesting and YES PLEASE KEEP TALKING ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH!
ReplyDeletexox