Degreed

Scotty will graduate from school this year. I have two thoughts on this:

Thought #1: Hooray!

Thought #2: Oh, no!

The "Oh, no!" part comes from the fear that when school is done, something else will take it's place (like a second job or a time-consuming church calling) and nothing will really be different.

The "Hooray!" part, well... that's obvious, right?

It is my hope and dream to be able to have my husband come home at the end of the work day. I want him to eat dinner with us and be a part of our evening routine. I want him to see his children while they are awake and hold the baby while I sweep the kitchen floor. I want him to go to bed with me instead of staying up for an extra three hours to do homework.

It has been a long, hard journey getting this degree.

Back when Scotty graduated high school, he planned to become an electrician. He spent a year working for an electric company before serving a two-year mission for the LDS Church. The plan was to come home from his mission and work for that company again while doing an apprenticeship program to become a journeyman.

While Scotty was on his mission, two major events happened. First, the terrorist attacks of September 11. Then the Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City. Both of these events resulted in a decrease in work, and the company had to start laying people off, so when the time came for Scotty to return to work, there wasn't a place for him in the company.

This was a huge devastation for us; we were completely lost. It had been "The Plan" - it was what Scotty wanted, and it was what I wanted, and our lives were supposed to fall perfectly in order after his mission.

Scotty spent about two weeks talking to all of his connections, trying to get his foot in the door at the electric company. One day, he ran into an old friend who worked at a warehouse. The friend suggested that Scotty come work with him. Scotty took the job thinking it was something to do for a few weeks before a job came through with the electric company.

Well, a job never came through, so Scotty's dreams for his education and career were crushed, and there was no Plan B.

So Scotty worked at the warehouse and quickly moved into management. He made decent money for a 21-year-old, and I was working, too, so we bought a house. Scotty's boss was very anti-school, so anytime Scotty made any mention of going to school, his boss would say things like, "You don't need to go to school. I'll make sure you're making X dollars in X amount of time. You'll be able to retire at age 35."

We were so young and impressionable. We fell under the guy's spell and believed every promise he made. Now, obviously, we know a lot more about life. And guess who got laid off and had to go to school?

Yep. That guy.

After a few years or working at the warehouse, Scotty came home one day and said, "I need to go to school."

It scared me, but I knew it was the right thing to do. I was pregnant with Nicky, our first baby, when Scotty started school.

Since Scotty had a good job and we had a house and a baby on the way, he started small by taking a few night classes at the community college. That became the routine, semester after semester, and when you work full-time and have a family, a few night classes can be overwhelming. Scotty ended up getting laid off from that "good job," and fortunately, quickly lined up another "good job," and the routine continued.

He graduated from the community college and transferred to a university. Then more night classes. Then a few day classes when things started getting less flexible (thanks to his employer for letting him attend class during lunch breaks and allowing him to leave work for class and work late to make up the time).

Now there is finally a light at the end of the tunnel. Two more semesters. TWO!!!

It will have taken nearly eight years. Scotty has been in school for the entirely of our children's lives. Save for two semesters Scotty had to take off for financial reasons, our children have never known their dad as a non-student. They have gone days at a time without seeing him because they go to sleep before he gets home from school at night and wake up after he leaves for work in the morning.

It has been very, very hard.

So this is a very exciting milestone for us.

It's not the path that I would have hand-picked for us. If I could start over, I might do it differently. But then again, as hard as it has been, we will come out of this in a good place. We've had our home for ten years, and we got it for a very good price. Scotty has a decent job - it has its inconveniences, but they have been so kind to work with him and his schooling. We will also have zero school-related debt. The first four years, we paid for everything ourselves. Then, for the last four years, we've been able to get some grants and reimbursements. We still have to cover some of the expense ourselves, but only about 25% of it.  It was hard to do since our income is "just enough" for what we need (we've relied heavily on Christmas money and tax returns).

Maybe, just maybe, it has been the better way to take the journey.

(For us).

(I don't think I would ever recommend it to anyone else).