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Monday, January 29, 2018

There I Am

A few weeks ago, I ate lunch under a large framed print of Carl Bloch's Sermon on the Mount painting. It's a very familiar piece to me since a lot of Carl Bloch's artwork is displayed in LDS churches and temples. It's also on the cover of the Gospel Art book.


I remember reading in a Dan Brown novel (I find them interesting - don't make fun of me) that in art, the hand pointing up, as it is in this painting, is a symbol of enlightenment, knowledge, or understanding. Dan Brown used the example of Horatio Greenough's sculpture of George Washington, but I immediately thought of the image of the Savior teaching on the Mount. 

As I sat under the painting enjoying my sandwich, I started looking at each of the people in the painting, wondering which one is me.

In truth, I see a little bit of myself in all of them. 


Sometimes I am this woman hiding my face and wallowing in my doubts, fears, insecurities, and weaknesses. 


Sometimes I'm this guy, sitting with my back toward the Savior but still listening over my shoulder just in case He says something I like. I kind of look at this man as the one with the FOMO. He's there just in case it ends up being good, but he's not "all in." 


Sometimes I'm this man in the background. I'm there, but I'm not listening all the way. I'm thinking about something else or leaning too far into my own intellect.


Other times, I'm one of these people whispering in the shadows. I'm listening but with the intent to gossip or scrutinize.


And then there's this guy. He's listening, but his body language suggests that there is part of him that is closed off from what he's hearing. It's like he's saying, "This is nice, but I'm not ready to give up this or that to follow you." He's listening, but he wants to take what he hears and process it on his own and then decide if it's what he wants. Sometimes I am him.


Sometimes I'm this man - listening intently but worried that I might be reproved. Ultimately, I'm on board with what the Savior says, but I'm on the edge of my seat because I don't want to feel chastened. I listen with equal parts hope and nerves.


Sometimes I am this person - wanting to be there to hear the message but lingering back just a little bit in case I'm not worthy. I want to be with the Savior, but I don't have the confidence to let Him see me up close.


Sometimes I am this child - innocently distracted by a butterfly (read more about Bloch's use of children in his paintings here - it will give you a fun, new way to look at his work).


Fortunately, despite all my other personal connections with this painting, I also see myself in this man - giving the Savior his full attention and getting as comfortable as possible because he's in it for the long haul. Yes, that is me, too. I hope to be this man more than I am anyone else in the scene. 

Saturday, January 27, 2018

Remembering Elder Von G. Keetch

This morning I woke up way too early on account of my two-year-old screaming. It was a frustrating event as she wanted a sippy cup of milk and was going to wake up the entire house over it. Then when I handed her the cup (in absolute darkness, mind you), she threw a fit because she wanted it to be pink (ABSOLUTE DARKNESS. I didn't even know what color the cup was, and I'd filled it!)

I couldn't go back to sleep, so I scrolled through facebook, and was saddened to see that Elder Von G. Keetch, a General Authority Seventy of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints passed away last night.


I recognize very few of the General Authorities by name. Elder Keetch is an exception. I knew him by more than just his name, though. He recently gave a prayer in a session of General Conference. I hadn't heard his name announced, but the second I heard him start praying (I was streaming and didn't have a visual), I said, "That's Elder Keetch!" He had a very distinct voice.

A couple of years ago, Elder Keetch presided at our Stake Conference. My normal reaction to a General Authority at Stake Conference is sort of "meh" (for lack of a better way to describe it). They come, they speak, they move on. It's fine. People in certain callings will rub shoulders with the General Authorities when they come due to various assignments surrounding the event, but I'm not in those positions, so I don't typically connect with them while they are in our presence.

Elder Keetch, again, was an exception.

When Elder Keetch came, Scotty and I attended a dinner for ward council and stake council members and their spouses (Scotty was the executive secretary at the time, and I was his plus-one). There were hundreds of people there, Elder Keetch and his wife included. In essence we were having dinner "with" the General Authority, but with so many people there, it wasn't really an intimate occasion. I was more interested in the free food than the presiding authority. Plus, the dinner started very late, and we were all rushed to finish up and get the chairs set up for a meeting that was taking place right after.

Later that night, Elder Keetch spoke to the adults of our stake. He was very funny and relatable, which is always nice when you're in the position of listening. I ended up really enjoying his message and thinking, "This Elder Keetch is pretty cool."

After the meeting, Elder Keetch was was making his way out of the chapel, and he was pretty close to me. I didn't intend to say anything to him in passing because, again, they come, the speak, they move on - regardless of how "cool" they are. But he walked right into my pew, right to me (I wasn't even making eye contact or anything), shook my hand, and told me how thankful he was that I was there, As if we'd been life-long friends. In my head, I was thinking, "Dude, you don't even know me." But he was completely sincere, and he sought me out in a chapel full of hundreds of people. I didn't go to him.

I left the meeting that night thinking, "I like this guy. Imma remember him."

A few months later, he gave the devotional address at my school, and I was able to watch the broadcast. I soaked in every word and have revisited the transcripts several times.

I've had the chance to teach the youth from Elder Keetch's conference address, "Blessed and Happy are Those Who Keep the Commandments of God" (I wrote on the board, "Welcome to Shark Week" and I gave all the kids a bag of gummy sharks. I thought I was hilarious. The kids just rolled their eyes). I thought there would be more conference addresses to come. I thought I'd see a lot more of Elder Keetch over the next twenty years.

I am heartbroken that that won't be the case, but... I like this guy. Imma remember him.


Friday, January 26, 2018

The Other Movies

Last night I took Nicky and Daisy to the bonafide, real deal, tried and true Greatest Showman sing along.

I also went the night before.

I'm really going to stop now. Maybe... I've seen the movie seven times. It's overkill. I know.

In general, I'm not a big movie watcher, but I definitely prefer the theater to watching a movie at home. I can't sit through a movie at home (although the perk of watching a movie at home is that I can turn on the subtitles. Scotty and I watch everything with subtitles. One of these days I'm going to start using the CC device at the theater).

As we were driving home last night, I was wondering to myself if there is any other movie I have watched (or would have watched if I had the resources) seven times. Normally, I don't even watch seven movies in a year, let alone ONE MOVIE seven times.


I remembered that I have done this before. When I was 11, I went to see the movie Man of the House (currently on Hulu, FYI) about 5-7 times (I also went to see Tom & Huck repeatedly, but probably only 3 times).

As J.T.T. fanatics, my friend Cheyenne and I were morally obligated to see his movies as many times as possible. I have no idea how we got the money for movie tickets over and over again, but each weekend, someone would drop us off at the theater to watch Man of the House, and then we would call from a payphone when the movie was over, and someone would come get us (this in itself is quite a memory as I can't imagine dropping my 11-year-old off at a movie theater and leaving him there with a quarter to call me when the movie is over, and yet, when I was a child, that's just how it was. I miss that dearly).

When I remembered this, I told Nicky about it. Nicky asked me why I saw those movies so many times, and I explained to him my obsessive crush on Jonathan Taylor Thomas. I told Nicky how I had J.T.T. posters all over my bedroom wall and how I wrote him letters all the times and sent him pictures of myself. I told Nicky all the facts I remember about J.T.T. from the magazines I used to read (favorite color: green, religion: Presbyterian, favorite movie: A River Runs Through It, favorite subject: history). Nicky thought this was the most bizarre thing he'd ever heard.

Then came the questions (I can always count on questions from Nicky).

"Is J.T.T. still alive?"

"Yes."

"How old is he now?"

"He's Daddy's age."

"So he's an old man?"

"No. He's Daddy's age. Dad's not an old man."

"So you like grandpas?"

"Nicky! He's not old. He's just an adult now."

"Do you want me to get you some posters of grandpas to hang in your room?"

"You're really funny."

"I can't believe you have a crush on a grandpa."

"Nicky! He's 36. He's not a grandpa!"

And on and on and on...

Nicky is relentless, but he made a good movie date. I joke that it takes two hours to wind down after seeing The Greatest Showman. Nicky followed suit. He was singing and bouncing off the walls until about 11:30* last night, and when I tucked him into bed, he was still talking a mile a minute. Who needs an energy drink when a dose of Hugh Jackman will do?

*There are some things worth bending the school night bed time rules for. This was one of them. 

Tuesday, January 23, 2018

The Dumb Things I Do

You might remember how I went to the Greatest Showman singalong that ended up NOT being the actual singalong. Its been a week and a half since I made that error, and I'm still upset about it. It continues to bother me because it's not like me to make that type of mistake.

It's also not like me to miss an appointment, so I'm still haunted by the haircut I forgot to take Nicky to over five years ago.

When I do a dumb thing that isn't characteristic of me, I struggle to get over it.

But lest you think I am on some type of high horse, I'm here to confess that there are some dumb things I do do. And I do them so often that I don't even let them phase me.

For example, I frequently leave my curling iron and straightener on. At this point, when Scotty tells me my curling iron is on, I go "meh."

(I shouldn't go "meh" because I could burn my house down someday, but I fully acknowledge that leaving my curling iron on is a dumb thing I'm capable of).



I also run into things with my van.

(Like parked cars).

(That sometimes belong to my husband).

(But other times they belong to strangers who are inside Panda Express eating lunch).


What can I say? I'm spatially challenged!

But...

The most frequent, top slot, number one dumb thing I do...

...is lock my keys in my car.

The first time it happened, I was in high school, and I was getting ready to take my car to get emissions and inspection done. I was on the passenger side of my car getting stuff out of the glove box, and I started the car from there. Then I got out of the car and locked the door.


To my dismay, my car was running! Aaaaaand I didn't have a spare key, so my grandpa called a lock smith for me, and the guy felt so bad for me, he only charged me $20.

In the 18 years I've been driving (18 years!!!), I've locked my keys in the car WITH THE CAR ON three times. One of those times was in the Home Depot parking lot. Scotty was ice fishing and had my spare key on his key ring, so I called my mom, and she came and got me. The car wasn't running, luckily, but the keys were in the ignition and the radio and lights were on. We had to jump start it that night after Scotty got home.

I don't know how many other times I've locked my keys in my car - I only have the tally of how many times the car was ON when I locked my keys in it because I can at least fit that number on one hand.


One of the times I locked my keys in the car was right as we were supposed to leave for a work conference in Las Vegas. The police ended up coming and breaking into my car for me (perks of having a step-dad who works for the police department).

I locked my keys in my car today, in fact. As soon as I noticed my keys weren't in their usual spot in my purse, I knew exactly where they were. I called a friend to come save me, and before she got there, I remembered that Scotty planted a spare key in my wallet for this exact occasion. I hurried and called my friend back to tell her she didn't need to come save me. The last time this happened, though, I had to borrow a cell phone (the phone was in the car with the keys) and call my mom and ask her to come get me, take me home to get the spare key, and take me back to my van.

I was trying to be self-sufficient and not bother Scotty at work, so I didn't say anything to him until the problem had been resolved. When I told him, Scotty said, "Why did you make your mom come get you? You have that key in your wallet!"*

Oh.

(But thanks for saving me, Mom).

Knowing how many more stories there are that I'm not sharing is making me realize just how bad the problem is.

Locking keys in the car?

That's a dumb thing I do.


*If I ever call you to come save me when I've locked my keys in my car, please ask me if I have a key in my wallet before you agree to come get me

Monday, January 22, 2018

Everything I Can Say in 8 Minutes

I haven't had much time or mental space for blogging over the past week, but I need to write. It's part of my being, even if it's not good. Right now I'm in between tasks, and I have exactly 8 free minutes (if Eva stays in her Daniel Tiger coma for that long).

And now I'm down to five minutes.

How did that happen?

So here's everything I can say in eight five minutes...

[Um... mind went blank]

I haven't seen The Greatest Showman since last week's sing along. I tried to entice a friend to go to a really late show on Saturday night, but it didn't work out.

Today I woke up in a foul mood... or I ended up on a foul mood quickly after waking.

For a long time, I woke up in the 5:00 hour and did amazing things like exercise (kind of) and read my scriptures. That all stopped around Christmas. Now I sleep until about 7:00. But today I woke up at 5:15 and stayed awake and thought, "This used to be my life." Like, a month ago. Funny how things change so quickly!

Two minutes...

I haven't had any soda since January 1st. That's not very long and yet, very long. Go me!

Also, I have read from the Book of Mormon every day this year. I've studied many other things that I'm pumped about, too. I love learning. I really do!

One minute...

Oh gosh, Britt don't panic.

Um.... Happy Monday, y'all!

(That minute didn't go very well).

(I feel like I just had to diffuse a bomb. THE PRESSURE!!!)

Monday, January 15, 2018

Weekend Roundup

Our weekend was a little crazy.

Scotty was in North Carolina all of last week, and I did a pretty good job holding down the fort on my own for the first part of the week. By Thursday, I was going a little stir crazy and needed to get out of the house. My kids had a short day on Thursday and no school on Friday, so I ended up searching for a good deal on a hotel room for the night. I thought it would be fun to pick them up from school, head somewhere away from home, and take advantage of a hotel pool. I found a reasonable hotel in Logan (which is about an hour and a half from Salt Lake). We headed straight to Logan after school. We had the pool and hot tub to ourselves (which I love because that way I can yell at my kids all I want), and there was also Disney Channel and free breakfast, so my kids were on cloud nine.


At 6:00 on Friday morning, Eva suddenly started gagging and choking like she was throwing up, so I flew out of bed, turned the light on, and grabbed a garbage can. She heaved a few times, and then just spit a little. I don't know what was going on with her, but I was on guard for the rest of the morning - constantly checking her forehead for a fever and ready to grab the garbage can in an instant, as it is tradition for someone to throw up any time Scotty is out of town. I was very disappointed that the initial incident resulted in everyone waking up so early. They might have slept for another half hour.


We hit breakfast, went swimming again, and then packed up and left at 11:00. We headed to a nearby town to visit a friend for a little while before heading home. On the way home, Daisy needed to pee, so I stopped at a Smith's Marketplace. On the way out of the store, Daisy and Zoe tripped over each other and fell flat on their faces in the parking lot. They screamed with dedication equal to an Oscar winning actress, and I dragged their reluctant bodies to the van. At this point, my gas light turned on, so we stopped to get gas, and then everyone started whining for food (Nicky was near death), so we went to McDonald's. We had to be home by 2:00 because my nieces and nephew were coming to sleep over. We pulled in the driveway right at 2:00, and they were waiting for us on our porch. I left Eva in the van for a few minutes while I unloaded some stuff and let everyone in the house. When I went out to get her, she was covered in chocolate. After my brother-in-law left, I went to unload more stuff from the van, and I discovered that it wasn't just chocolate... it was m&m throw up. Eva had puked while I was letting the kids in the house.

I spent the next hour trying to bathe Eva and get everything unpacked from our trip while the other kids ran around the house destroying everything in their paths. As all of this was going on, my neighbor dropped off 30 pounds of raw chicken that she had ordered for me, so I was also trying to repackage the meat and get it in the freezer. Then the ward mission leader called and asked if I could feed the missionaries, and at that point, I just busted out in hysterical laughter.


(I politely declined).

It was pure chaos. Eva cried... and cried... and cried. I kept checking her forehead. She felt a little bit warm, but after an hour, she was acting pretty normal and didn't seem to be running a fever at all. Still, there was no way I was getting the throw up cleaned out of the car seat until at least Monday.

Then, just to make things more interesting, my three-year-old niece was complaining that her tummy hurt. About every fifteen minutes, she would moan about her stomach and say that she wanted her mom and dad. This continued until she fell asleep at 8:00.

I wasn't sure what the night would bring, but I was pretty confident that someone was gonna barf.

I was wrong.

Instead, my niece had explosive diarrhea in her pull-up, and I woke up at 6:00 to everyone freaking out about the smell. I went downstairs, and the scent hit me like a brick (when Scotty got home at 2:00 that afternoon, he could smell it still). It was atrocious! It was all up her back, and since she had slept in it for a while, it had dried to her. I cleaned her up the best I could and then put her in the bath. It was the type of bath that needed to be drained twice. She had clearly passed a demon through her colon.


I bagged up the poo clothes and put the blankets in the wash. I fed everyone and got them dressed. Their dad came at 10:00 to get them and then I spent the next hour cleaning up smashed goldfish crackers and play-doh.

(Since I've already maxed out on poop conversation in this post, I'm not going to tell you about how Eva pooped all over the new living room rug later that day. I also won't tell you that it was a lot).

It was mid-day that I experienced the great singalong catastrophe of 2018. I needed something to keep us busy while we waited for Scotty to get home from North Carolina, and the non-singalong was the answer.


I was so upset about the singalong, and I kept debating whether I should try again. I'd seen the movie four times, and I thought it might be time to stop, but I ended up talking with some friends at a birthday party that evening, and we decided to go for it! So the happy ending to the singalong catastrophe is that I went to the real singalong. There were words on the screen, people REALLY sang, and I got as close as I have ever been to singing a duet thanks to the gentleman I was sitting next to (the dude could hold a tune, so I decided we were going for it - me & this stranger. He sang Zac Efron's notes, and I sang Zendaya's, and we rewrote the stars)

(We high-fived after).


I made the decision late Saturday night that I was going to stop seeing The Greatest Showman, mostly for the sake of our budget. But on Monday, I decided that if someone invited me to go to the singalong again, I was going!

No one invited me.

Jerks.

I spent Sunday and Monday in recovery from the events of the weekend, and in all honesty, my recovery will continue through most of this week. I am always really ornery the week after Scotty is out of town. I do okay while he's away, but when he gets back, I'm a beast.

Sunday, January 14, 2018

Thoughts I had During the Greatest Showman Singalong


"Wow! These seats are pretty spiffy. I'll definitely come to this theater again."

"This is going to be awesome!"

"How many recliners are in here? Twenty seats, ten rows. Wow! There are like 200 recliners in here!"

"Those people don't look like the singalong type."

"Previews... previews... previews... c'mon, c'mon, c'mon!"

"I am so sick of this Sherlock Gnomes preview."

"YESSSSS! HERE WE GO!"

"WHOOOAAA!"

"Wait, why can't I hear anyone singing?"

"WHOOOAAA!"

"Seriously, is anyone singing?"

"Bummer. I was kind of hoping the words would be on the screen. Oh well. I've got this."

"Ladies and gents, this is the moment you've waited for!"

"Hugh Jackman! Yes. So many feelings. That voice. Are people singing yet?"

"I can't hear anyone. Maybe they are all feeling self-conscious. I will sing a little louder to help them know that it's okay."

"This is really disappointing. I dragged my four kids by myself to a singalong and no one is singing. Do I dare ask for my money back?"

"These people are reacting to the movie as if they are seeing it for the first time. Why did they come to a singalong if they haven't seen the movie?"

"Look out cause here I come! And I'm marching on to the beat I drum!"

"I can't believe no one is singing. I am so sad about this. I really want my money back, but will they be less likely to give my money back if I stay for the whole movie?"

"Whatever. I'm singing."

"From now on, these eyes will not be blinded by the lights!"

"I'm really sad for my kids. I talked this up like it was going to be a really cool experience."

"I can't believe I just sat through an entire singalong with no one singing."

"Were people annoyed that I was singing? They knew it was a singalong, right?"

"It was kind of weird that the words weren't on the screen. I really thought the words would be there."

"Wait a minute. Is there a chance I bought tickets to the wrong show? Maybe I should look before I go ask for my money back,"

"Oh crap."

Monday, January 8, 2018

Let's Talk a Bit About that Movie

Over the weekend I went to see The Greatest Showman... again... twice. 

The first time I saw it was the weekend it opened. I'd been looking forward to the movie for about six months. I follow Hugh Jackman on Instagram (one of three celebrities I follow - the others are Carrie Underwood and Justin Timberlake), and he'd been posting about the movie for a while. I made sure to catch the live promo that aired during A Christmas Story on Fox, and from that moment on, I was literally counting down the hours until I could see it.

I was kind of surprised when the theater only had 8 people in it, but there's something special about a movie that becomes big by word of mouth. News of this one traveled fast - all these weeks later, you have to fight to get a seat to the show (I had seats bought out from under me twice over the weekend).

I went to see it on Friday night with friends and on Saturday with my kids.

On Friday, we had a group of 13. Three of us had seen it before, and the other ten were newbies. I was so excited to watch it with my friends and to witness some of them seeing it for the first time. One of them commented afterward that he kept looking down the row during the movie, and everyone was smiling.

(It's true! You have to smile through the whole thing!)

On Saturday evening, we didn't have plans, so I took Nicky and Daisy to see it. Since we've listened to the soundtrack so much at home, they both knew the music. Daisy sang through the whole movie, and every time a new song started, she would turn to me and say, "This song is in the movie, too?" (She doesn't quite grasp the concept of a soundtrack). I knew a little bit of the movie would be over their heads, and sure enough, I had to have a follow-up discussion with Daisy about the "oddities" (she was particularly worried about the probability of growing a beard someday). They liked it, though.

I love the whole movie (the story is good, the characters are wonderful, the songs are fantastic, and the choreography is superb) but there are two parts that stand out as my favorites.

***Spoilers Ahead***

The first is when Jenny Lind is singing, and Carlyle brushes his hand against Anne's. This scene has so much emotion, and when they finally grasp hands, I just want to stand up and cheer. It's so tender. But then... Carlyle lets go because he sees his parents watching. Anne is hurt and walks away, and Phillip stares straight forward, processing what he'd just done while tears begin to well up in his eyes. Such a great acting moment for Zac Efron. Bravo, Zac! Bravo!

My other favorite part is during "From Now On" when P.T. takes off in a dead sprint toward his family. I think Hugh Jackman's inner Wolverine shows a little. I love that he can't get there fast enough, and it almost, kind of, sort of makes me want to run too.

Add a few coattail flips, some slow motion camera work, and a handful of shot glasses (because all the best musical numbers take place in bars and caverns), and you've got one excellent movie.

Thank you for this, Hugh Jackman. It is the highlight of my winter.

Christmas 2017

Friday, January 5, 2018

Currently {New Year 2018 Edition}

Reading: The Green Mile by Stephen King

Watching: The Blacklist

Procrastinating: All household responsibilities. As soon as I'm done with this post, I am going to spring into action... in theory.

Wanting: A storage unit so I can empty half my house but still keep all my crap

Craving: Chinese food

Wearing: A zip-up robe of sorts. I refer to it as my "housecoat."

Relieved by: My kids being back in school. Winter break is brutal!

Stressing about:  All the standard stressors - money, medical things, kid things, house things...

Missing: My fitness abilities of years past

Excited to: Go see The Greatest Showman again tonight. I've had to practice great restraint to NOT go see it before today. A few weeks ago I pre-arranged a babysitter for January 5th so I could go do something for my birthday. There's no question about how I want to spend that time!

I've also forced myself to avoid listening to the soundtrack for the past week (I've broken about once daily) because I wanted to make it all the more exciting to see it in the theater again.

Neglecting: My storage room that desperately needs to be organized

Trying: To quit soda... again. I'm almost four days sober. I know that's nothing, but to me, it's huge. I went to Cafe Rio yesterday, and I didn't get a Vanilla Coke. This is a big deal! And when I go to the movie tonight, I'm not going to get Sprite with my popcorn even though I firmly believe that Sprite and movie theater popcorn are a match made in heaven.

(I will struggle. There may be convulsions. Don't be alarmed).

Feeling: Really tired. I haven't been sleeping well lately. I've been waking up at 4:00 every morning, and then I have a hard time falling back asleep. "A million dreams are keeping me awake." Then right around 5:00, Eva wakes up and cries, and I have to get her out of bed and meet all of her demands.

Wishing: That my vacuum could clean hard floors. It just shoots the dirt everywhere even though it has a setting specifically for hard floors.

Burdened by: Things that need to be charged via USB cable. So many things to charge! As of Christmas, we now have toys and shoes that need to be charged. I guess it's nice to not need batteries, but the cords are ridiculous!

Hoping: That Scotty and I can take an anniversary trip this year. It's our 15th, so it would be really fun to go on a trip, but I don't know if it's feasible. Maybe we should hold out for our 20 year.

Frustrated with: The Top Two. There are two things that consistently frustrate me, and they are both in full force right now.

Loving: That Zoe and Eva have been playing together all morning. They've completely destroyed the house, but they have been getting along!

Worried about: Influenza and lice. My kids were exposed to both this past week, and I have been feeling their foreheads and checking their hair hourly ever since.

Thankful for: Stretchy jeans.

Monday, January 1, 2018

Birthday Wishes

Happy New Year! Today is my birthday, and I have so many free meals to eat this week that I need to make a schedule in order to fit them all in.

(Today I will be enjoying a Red Robin burger).

This morning I took some time to reflect on all of my birthday wishes from years past:

Age 1: A Cabbage Patch doll [got]
Age 2: A kitchen set [got]
Age 3: Mr. and Mrs. Heart Barbies [got and still have Mr. Heart]
Age 4: A Cinderella dress [didn't get]
Age 5: A keyboard [got]
Age 6: An MC Hammer tape [got]
Age 7: Nickelodeon [didn't get]
Age 8: A CD player [got]
Age 9: A sewing machine [got]
Age 10: Littlest Pet Shop toys [got]
Age 11: Jonathan Taylor Thomas [didn't get]
Age 12: A shirt that says "Whatever" [got]
Age 13: Wide-legged jeans [got]
Age 14: Scotty [didn't get]
Age 15: Scotty [got]
Age 16: To survive Y2K [got]
Age 17: Clear skin [didn't get]
Age 18: A new car [got...eventually - a 1997 Saturn SL2]
Age 19: An engagement ring [got]
Age 20: A house [got]
Age 21: A baby [didn't get]
Age 22: A baby [didn't get]
Age 23: A baby [got]
Age 24: The latest season of LOST on DVD [got]
Age 25: A dance party [got]
Age 26: Board games [got]
Age 27: New paint in the family room [got]
Age 28: Comments on my blog [got]
Age 29: A family vacation [got - Disneyland, of course]
Age 30: To go to two movies back to back [got - The Secret Life of Walter Mitty and Saving Mr. Banks]
Age 31: A degree [got... two years later]
Age 32: A new family room [didn't get]
Age 33: A Mormon Mom Planner [got]

As for my current birthday (age 34), the list of what I want is simple: a family room, kids that don't fight, a can opener, socks, walls that never get scratched or dinged, storage closets, a washer with quadruple capacity, an order of fries, Sue, a clean house, a massage, great hair, flat abs, shoes that don't hurt my feet, a healthy family, a home gym, Hugh Jackman, a dozen pairs of stretchy pants, a hot shower, a mug of cocoa, teleportation abilities, two extra arms, and a heated blanket.